Saturday 18th September 2021

Reflections On Mother’s Day 2021. 56.1/2021.

Reflections On Mother’s Day 2021. 56.1/2021.

 

Content Warning: Should any post about Mother’s Day be a concern for you, please don’t read…I am sorry for your situation whatever it is.

 

After a long period of reflection (years) I chose to write about Mother’s Day to be published on Mother’s Day, 2021.

My mother told me Mother’s Day flowers were chrysanthemums and were always white. She recalls her mother being given a white flower at church on Mother’s Day. I remember these things. But cannot find any pics of chrysanthemums.

Here it IS Mother’s Day 2021.

I cannot help but do a trip down memory lane to try to understand my mother and my mothering…OK. Not all of it, because much cannot be put into words.

Reflections.

  • I grew up in a 1950s-60s  household where Mother’s Day was remembered….by my father whose domineering and controlling manner meant I have had his words about this occasion rattling around my head since I could remember. Maybe 6 till my recent old(er) age.
  • It was a day where of course we gave Mum a card, probably some flowers and may be a gift. But I never thought of the occasion without ‘obligation’. This is who I am. Long memory.
  • Mum was a kind, sharing and shy woman whose care of her husband and us two kids was exemplary. She loved that she could care for us that way. In fact, it carried on to the ways in which our kids and my brother’s would remember “Noreen” for, and her three great-grandchildren who knew her before her death in 2007.
  • Dad….where will I start? Here at the point of the conversation I had with him only 3 weeks ago when I spoke of the courage his mother had coming to Australia to marry her fiance. His comments? “She was alway cranky and complaining and wanted to know, when we arrived to visit, when we were returning” OK. I understand but as I said, Gran having been widowed with 4 kids probably had a lot of grief.
  • So why did I begin to resent the forced nature of Mother’s Day? Probably for that reason. It did not come from my heart and then, as I had kids (strange but true) I believe I began to feel the old family history repeating itself.
  • Sigh.
  • I became entangled in the “event” that should be happening as I am a mother. Oh how embarrassed I am now about that. I did not demand anything (not my Dad) but I felt sad and disappointed if I was forgotten on Mother’s Day.
  • Cringe.

What Has Changed?

  • My mature thinking, a big dose of cancer and an obligation-free mindset
  • I honour MY adult kids as they make me so proud to be their Mum.
  • I actually asked my kids, a few years back,  to allow for my imperfections (there are many) as their Mum as I was, at the time, doing the best I knew.
  • I expect nothing back. At long last. Not anything. Thanks Dad…by the way, I have told him this but his memory is…dim.
  • I know that I am loved but I do not need to see evidence or whatever based on the ‘have to’ mindset we see far too often.

Two Posts: 1971 and 1979.

These two posts are about my mothering years, in particular giving birth to our daughter, and then after a long gap where we thought that we could not have any more children, we had our son.

My Mother’s Day 2021.

  • It’s a Sunday.
  • We will be cleaning the house on our fortnightly roster.
  • I will go out for my Sunday coffee.
  • I will reflect on my gratitude for a change of mind and heart and send my love to our kids and their kids…and Dad.
  • Forgiveness is powerful as is My Loving Kindness practice.

Take care of yourselves and each other.

Denyse.

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Nature Is Pretty In Bright Pink. 52.1/2021.

Nature Is Pretty In Bright Pink. 52.1/2021.

Now I am back! Again. Loving BRIGHT as a Squares Challenge!

Becky encouraged me to do this too, after I saw the challenge elsewhere  and it didn’t have to be every day…so here I am.

https://beckybofwinchester.com/2021/04/01/bright-square/

Being Square is Fun!

Join in this lovely challenge and post a photographic square daily for one month every quarter. The theme changes every quarter and is announced on this blog a few weeks, occasionally days, in advance of the challenge month. The challenge months are January, April, July and October.

I am going to admit something here. I love using my Iphone ProMax and its camera gives me soooo many great shots, that I have started finding nurseries to visit just to photograph flowers. Oh, and I did buy a few of these pretty in bright pinks for adding to a place outside to brighten our mornings.

I also stopped the car in a street with many beautiful camellias this week as I was visiting my Dad.

So, Bright is it. Pretty in BRIGHT Pink.

Thank you Becky for this challenge which I found got me right in. I will be back in July to see what you have in store. Oh, and I also learned how easy it was to add my name and copyright.

Cheers from Australia.

Denyse.

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My Zen Is Found In The Garden. Part Two. 42/2019.

My Zen Is Found In The Garden. Part Two. 42/2019.

Recently I wrote about how I find having a garden is good for my mental (and physical!) health.

However, I must now add, that looking at flowers en masse, individually and observing their colours and textures takes me on an artist’s journey.

I see:

  • patterns
  • tones
  • colours
  • shapes
  • textures

I have tried to replicate some via my drawings and mandalas but nothing quite tops Mother Nature.

I am glad to recognise the peaceful, relaxing and health-filled responses I have when I visit not only my meagre garden but in parks and others’ gardens.

Here’s my collection of favourites. Some were grown where we live now and in pots, others were at the last house. The sweet peas at the bottom were from the last time I grew them. Two years ago. I love sweet peas so I have given them another go this year. Fingers crossed!

Do you find going into the garden relaxing?

Do you notice your breathing slows when you are immersed in nature?

I believe that nature is a healing space and place and I love that!

It cetainly is a place I can re-capture my ‘zen’.

Thanks to Min for her Tuesday link up #zentipstuesday here.

Denyse.

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