Wednesday 19th January 2022

Words To Live By In 2022. 2/51 #LifeThisWeek. 2/2022.

 Words To Live By In 2022. 2/51 #LifeThisWeek. 2/2022.

Welcome to the second link up for 2022 here at Denyse Whelan Blogs.

Thank you to Tanya for my new link up image. Do copy it for your blog if you share my link up there.

 

A reminder of the link up rules…not much has changed but it never hurts to have a refresher, right?

You can link up something old or new, just come on in.

* Please add just ONE post each week! NOT a link-up series of posts, thank you.

* Please do stay to comment on my post as I always reply and it’s a kind thing to do!

* Check out what others are up to: Leave a comment on a few posts, because we all love our comments, right!

* Add a link back to this blog in your post somewhere, or on your sidebar or let others know somewhere you are linking up to this blog’s Life This Week.

*Posts deemed by me, the owner of the blog & the link-up, to be unsuitable for my audience will be deleted without notice. These may include promotions, advertorials and any that are overly religious or political or in any way offensive  in nature.

 

Words To Live By…in 2022.

See my post from last week here.

I am adding more to the words:

BE

ME

I need to remember this word.

P I V O T

I have an issue with my right leg since the fibula was removed and it means I cannot ‘pivot’ myself with ease…I feel I could fall.

But that’s not what I meant.

There have been many occasions in 2021, particularly related to living in pandemic conditions when I have had to change my thoughts and activities that may have been planned. ‘Old’ me would have ranted and railed on some occasions, but now, I can express disappointment but learn to change my ‘tune’.

There was a ‘perfect’ example where I had to practise my pivoting and that was when our plans for Christmas Day in Sydney with our family was cancelled for us as I had symptoms of Covid and needed a PCR test.

But wait there is MORE.

I reckon I need to pivot almost every day…the huge change to how we ‘live with covid’ since Omicron exploded here and around the world means this.

For me and B, it’s about making ourselves a relatively safe place at home, like a virtual lockdown. I have had to say to my Dad, 98 tomorrow, that I am not driving down to see him because:

  1. My GP thinks I still have remnants of the virus that is not covid…he is right. I can be feeling well for a time, then whoosh, feel weak and lethargic and my gut is affected
  2. Keeping boundaries of self care rather than my old-hard-to-lose practices of people pleasing and I end up not doing well
  3. I will talk to Dad on the day, maybe even facetime if my brother is with him and I sent a card….

And we are literally taking each day at a time here.

Plans for this week, and into next week cannot be formally set. Covid threats and our health continuing to go well is paramount. We are doing what we can ….and it’s hard when I know we would love to see family and get out and about more. Not happening. For now, and the foreseeable future.

Want to use “pivot” too? Go ahead! It’s yours….

I will consider many of these words to help me

BE

ME

 

H.E.A.R.T.

words…..because I am a feelings person first!

Health  Empathy  Awareness      Rest     Trust    

Hope   Emotions    Acceptance       Revive        Truth  

Honesty    Education     Acknowledgment     Review      Time

Words from previous years to continue to  help guide me.

my WOTY 2021 is going to accompany me in 2022

SMILE from 2021 was a good one, as was GRATITUDE in 2020,

Thoughts on Gratitude

and the others before helped me through my cancer years B.O.L.D. and before then,

I gave ACCEPTANCE a go somewhat unsuccessfully in 2015 and KINDNESS in 2016.

Words To Help Remind Me About Living Well

  • I am also learning….to, as my husband tells me…hasten slowly.
  • I am a recovering striver*, with high achievements behind me and a pretty fast paced mind …matches my walking style.
  • * I made this up but it works for me to be more aware….
  • I will stroll more than walk at pace when I really want to surround myself with sensory memories.
  • I will continue my morning and evening meditation practice.
  • I will put my devices down for a time (increasing from 10 mins at first) to pick up a magazine or book.

I will not think that I have to DO something every.single.minute.

I am learning to BE ME more.

I will make mistakes and then I will say that’s OK, and remember what my intention is to have at age 72:

  • a somewhat less busy daily life
  • time for me
  • time for being with B
  • and time to play…with art, words, photos and more.
  • and I will be colouring my world.

Check out next week’s post about Colouring My World in 2022.

I am confident that it will all be something I learn to love and will wonder how I lead the life I did before now!

What do you think?

Denyse.

Life This Week. #273. 10.1.2022.

You can link up something old or new, just come on in.

* Please add just ONE post each week! NOT a link-up series of posts, thank you.

* Please do stay to comment on my post as I always reply and it’s a kind thing to do!

* Check out what others are up to: Leave a comment on a few posts, because we all love our comments, right!

* Add a link back to this blog in your post somewhere, or on your sidebar or let others know somewhere you are linking up to this blog’s Life This Week.

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Wishing. 51/51. #LifeThisWeek. 132/2021.

Wishing. 51/51. #LifeThisWeek. 132/2021.

Wishing you all, dear readers, bloggers and friends, a very happy festive season.

Whether you celebrate or not, or believe in the Christian version of Christmas, or perhaps celebrate a different season in your family and beliefs’ calendar, you are wished:

GOOD health…always

GOOD prospects for the year  ahead

GOOD news all the way….(a bit fanciful but it is about wishing, right?)

GOOD fortune.

Take care of yourselves and each other.

The post today is light on…I have added Telling My Story : Christmas Memories into the link up…and filled with good wishes to you all!

See you back here, if you are planning so, on Monday 3 January 2022. Life this Week. 

My current image background. My two kids in left and right pics…me with 3 oldest Gkids in middle, and those three with one son of my son!

Denyse.

Four songs from “MY” Christmas memories.

My oldest grandkids – see photo above “loved” Hi Five way back.

 

My fave to sing along in the car since 2014:

And the song which helped me ‘get through’ hard times at Christmas 2017 in recovering from my 2 (then) head and neck cancer surgeries.

See you soon…in two weeks exactly.

Denyse.

Started Life This Week Link Up. Sept 2016.

Life This Week. #271.

You can link up something old or new, just come on in.

* Please add just ONE post each week! NOT a link-up series of posts, thank you.

* Please do stay to comment on my post as I always reply and it’s a kind thing to do!

* Check out what others are up to: Leave a comment on a few posts, because we all love our comments, right!

* Add a link back to this blog in your post somewhere, or on your sidebar or let others know somewhere you are linking up to this blog’s Life This Week.

*Posts deemed by me, the owner of the blog & the link-up, to be unsuitable for my audience will be deleted without notice. These may include promotions, advertorials and any that are overly religious or political or in any way offensive  in nature.

 

See you back here, I hope on Monday 3 January 2022.

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Share Your Snaps. #10. 50/51 #LifeThisWeek. 131/2021.

Share Your Snaps #10. 50/51 #LifeThisWeek. 131/2021. 

Before moving on to Sharing My Snaps for the final time in 2021, big thank you to everyone for this year’s support of the link up.

 

As already announced, here, #LifeThisWeek returns on Monday 3 January 2022.

No prompts unless you want to use any I have come up with. I am not sure if I will have a word of the year for 2022 but there is always that option.

Next week, the final link up for 2021, WISHING, I am sharing a post I didn’t know I needed to write called “Telling My Story: Christmas Memories”.

Do link up for one last time in 2021 if you have a post, old or new to share.

 

Sharing My Snaps #10 is from mostly scenes of nature I have noticed and been within…to really see, experience and enjoy. Few words! For once.

From the past month.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Places to visit and see with my husband included the Boardwalk at Terrigal on a surprisingly sunny day for once, as a repeat visit.

Thanks from us both for your kindness and support of us blogging and sharing life with you all from our, ahem, very different perspectives.

and he expects me to ask for selfie these days…even if we don’t quite get it right….ha!

Bernard & Denyse.

The Head and Neck Australia Christmas Choir is going live (live!) and I guess I will see it once I am up and about…the link is here:

 

But wait…it appears there is MORE…and words too.

  • P.S. Not from nature itself but very much about human nature and more is this book. I couldn’t wait to get the, ahem, cheaper copy so went to local QBD for this and I have already invested myself into the very different ways in which Brene Brown is both sharing and doing her utmost for us all to come to an understanding of all that makes us emotional human beings. I am a fan already but this work is different.
  • I am also tuning into her podcasts called Unlocking Us , here,  about Atlas of the Heart and awaiting the audible version in February 2022.

  • P.P.S. In big news (nah, not really!) I am getting somewhat better at my zoom game. I just haven’t used it (and haven’t need to) much but many others have I know.
  • So, I got some practice and was able to be part of a zoom meeting to assist in great head and neck cancer awareness and sharing with CEO Nadia Rosin, from Head and Neck Cancer Australia and Dr Mike Freelander MP, a Federal MP from Macarthur region in Sydney. I even managed a background which both commented on. See second photo!

 

 

And then, I got some kind of virus and was not able to meet up with my local federal MP and the CEO of Head & Neck Cancer Australia…we will catch up in 2022.

I did get to have an unexpected 8th ( I think) Covid19 test instead. I have had this many as most were required for me to attend doctors’ surgeries and to be admitted to hospital for surgeries in 2020.

And as I recovered on Friday, I felt well enough to venture out, driving to Porter’s Creek to enjoy some peace by the river and to notice nature. Of course.

A lovely friend and blogger, Katherine, who has shared here many times, now lives in San Francisco and as it was her birthday when I went here, I made a mini vid for 20seconds of Aussie bush sounds. She told me she felt the breeze too!

Take care,

Denyse.

I will be back to comment after seeing Dad in Dee Why today and I am also dropping in some Christmas treats to my brother and sister-in-law on the way as they live that way too. They do the heavy lifting in terms of any errands for Dad or taking him to appointments. I still do Christmas treats as gifts although my interest and motivation is slowly waning.

My Christmas treats: mini cupcakes and brownies. Some are for individuals, others for families.

Link Up #270.

Life This Week. #270.

You can link up something old or new, just come on in.

* Please add just ONE post each week! NOT a link-up series of posts, thank you.

* Please do stay to comment on my post as I always reply and it’s a kind thing to do!

* Check out what others are up to: Leave a comment on a few posts, because we all love our comments, right!

* Add a link back to this blog in your post somewhere, or on your sidebar or let others know somewhere you are linking up to this blog’s Life This Week.

*Posts deemed by me, the owner of the blog & the link-up, to be unsuitable for my audience will be deleted without notice. These may include promotions, advertorials and any that are overly religious or political or in any way offensive  in nature.

Monday 20 December: last link up for 2021. Wishing.

See you back here then, I hope.

Link Up recommences in 2022 on Monday 3 January.

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Taking Stock.#5. 48/51. #LifeThisWeek. 128/2021.

Taking Stock.#5. 48/51. #LifeThisWeek. 128/2021.

This is the last taking stock  in 2021 and may not be another when in 2022.

So, as this could be the “last one” I am going to share here about my life as it is on the eve of my 72nd birthday.

And as Pema Chodron says here…..

I am grateful for all who have made a difference in my life. Not all people are represented here because I may not have had an image. So, here goes, using images to ‘match’ a word. And using my alphabetical list.

 

Admiring: those people who are the trained professionals in all allied health, surgery and more, and have cared for my health.

Becoming: a part of a family, grateful for the love, care and kindness of parents and grandparents since 1949!

Curious: about life and learning….always! 

Delighted: to meet up with on-line friends when I can.

Excited: that we will get to celebrate my birthday…..out for morning tea! It suits us both to do this…here’s a memory from 2018. If the rain stays away we will be going here again: a local nursery.

 

Feeling: that time is moving way too fast….that seems to happen after 70!

Goingto my Dad’s sometime in December to share some meals and treats. He’s certainly been the constant in my life…known me for more than 72 years!! This from my 71st birthday when I am not sure who was helping who stay on their feet. 

Helping: Head and Neck Cancer Australia as an Ambassador. I have held this volunteer role for 3 years and as I said to the CEO recently, “you got me for life“.

Imploring: people to keep an eye on anything (related to Head and Neck cancer* symptoms)  that might be not healing or increasing in pain. size and so on…and ensuring if a GP or dentist, doesn’t take it seriously, to seek out another option. *all cancers of course,  but these ones have no diagnostic tools.

Joking: No idea what was funny at Oxley lookout last year but this bloke is quite the joker….and this wife, is not always ready for his sense of humour! 

Keeping: this blog going into its 12th year is testament to my commitment but to the engagement of this blogging community even more! 

Loving: the freedom of days’ activities choice when retired. Sure, there is a routine of sorts, and yes, we get up by a certain time (not tellin’) …but no bosses!

Making: memories for me and others! By cards, photos and little albums. I love doing it too.

Next: I am too easily wanting to plan what is next yet, at the same time trying to stay in the present. The one thing for me is knowing where we will be living next year, and so far, the owners have agreed to us staying on. HOWEVER, the way real estate prices have risen here, houses in our street up by $200-300K in less than 4 years, we suspect we will get a rent rise. Sigh.

Observing: the places where I lived as a teen and older and having a deep appreciation for that time. 

 

Pleasing: to notice that I can continue to change some health habits slightly to be more health-aware in my ageing years.

Reading: the many and varied posts that YOU, my blogging friends, share here for Life This Week. We are, today, at #268 of the link up. And how I met some of my blogging friends two years ago.

Staying: on track with meditation. It will be 2 years without missing a session by end of 2021. I now do Daily Calm in the morning and another track in the evening. It still counts as one day! 

Trying: to remember all I am grateful for more than ever…not everyone gets the chance to continue living as I have post-cancer.

 

Understanding: that life is not static. Der. But sometimes when I don’t want things to change, I then remember that they change anyway so grasping to keep things are they are is not on. I have learned much about this thanks to meditation, and listening to a range of CDs from teachers of Buddhism and more. Very wise people..and we are all human. 

Viewing: old photos for this post and feeling the warmth of nostalgia but also heeding the point above! 

Welcoming: changes to Covid restrictions here in N.S.W. soon, with reduction of places where you need to sign in with QR code, and having the choice to wear a mask. We think, for now, we will continue to mask up if in a crowded shop or doctors’ surgery. Definitely needed recently at a Big Hug Box packing day. NB: hope with new strain variant, we will remain vigilent.

X- “X-tra grateful” to all of the women who shared their stories of courage. In the 3 years, more than 72 women shared their stories. Wow. I have included images of all who continue to blog and link up here fairly regularly. I “hope” I have you all in this group. Let me know, if I have missed you. 

Yes: to more plans to do ‘less’….and that sounds like a contradiction. In the meantime, here I am over decades of my life ‘doing’ what I most enjoy: connecting with those I care for and who love me. Perhaps a bit of a stretch re Former PM Julia Gillard, but she did thank me for my education roles. 

Z – Is there anyone else I need to show my gratitude and admiration for their part of my life? Yes, it’s an old image but the LOVE from this Papa to his only grandchildren cannot be surpassed. And the love we had for him is exemplified in my brother now being Papa to his 2 grandkids and that B became Papa when his eldest granddaughter couldn’t get her mouth around Grandpa, and out came “Pa-Pa” and it sure stuck.

Thank you all for reading, commenting and sharing your blog post today.

Take care,

Denyse.

 

Started Life This Week Link Up. Sept 2016.

Life This Week. #268

You can link up something old or new, just come on in.

* Please add just ONE post each week! NOT a link-up series of posts, thank you.

* Please do stay to comment on my post as I always reply and it’s a kind thing to do!

* Check out what others are up to: Leave a comment on a few posts, because we all love our comments, right!

* Add a link back to this blog in your post somewhere, or on your sidebar or let others know somewhere you are linking up to this blog’s Life This Week.

*Posts deemed by me, the owner of the blog & the link-up, to be unsuitable for my audience will be deleted without notice. These may include promotions, advertorials and any that are overly religious or political or in any way offensive  in nature.

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Taking Stock #4 37/51 #LifeThisWeek. 5th Birthday Edition. 112/2021

Taking Stock #4 37/51 #LifeThisWeek. 5th Birthday Edition. 112/2021.

This Taking Stock is different as I am using images from the 5 years of this link up….

for which I am grateful  and that you, dear blogger and reader  play a very important part…

as it shares some of my stories…

Because back on this day in September 2016 where I posted this…I did not know what lay ahead. I

f you do open the link, you will see it’s a bit like a time capsule. 24 bloggers linked up. Sadly some no longer blog.

Is your name or blog there I wonder?

Present: September 2021.

My focus as a blogger who loves to connect is  summed up in these images on the home page.

I’ve chosen the months of May, September and December for 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, 2020….to take stock!

Whilst  I am not using my A-Z list this time round, I am pretty sure I am using images which spark:

GRATITUDE

LOVE

HEALTH

CONNECTION

APPRECIATION

CARE

MEMORIES

(no meaning in the colours…just used rainbow colours to give headings a different look!) 

Back to: September 2016. When Link Up Began

My dear friend Tanya who makes my blog the colour-filled one it is, and helped me refresh the blog at the beginning of 2016, made this for the link up. Always grateful to her:

Started Life This Week Link Up. Sept 2016.

September 2016.

December 2016.

May 2017.

September 2017.

December 2017.

May 2018.

September 2018

December 2018.

May 2019

September 2019

December 2019

May 2020

September 2020

December 2020

May 2021

September 2021

On 7th September 2021 I had great news from my head and neck cancer surgical team that because my mouth looks good inside, I don’t need to return to them for another YEAR and that visit will be my last. I can scarcely believe it. Yes, so grateful of course and yes to all the support many here have given me….so here’s to good health for us all: Click on the link, please:

https://youtu.be/N91kCMHTzEA

Thank you for being here, whether from the start of the link up or as the years have gone on.

Delighted to announce that I will continue my Monday Link Up for 2022.

I have the plans in readiness for a different set of ‘optional prompts’. I have shared them with one blogger already to get a feel for how they might work out and they should do well. As usual they are optional. I will publish a separate post about this in October-November.

Meanwhile:

Stay well

Stay covid-free

And Be Fully Vaccinated (if you can and health permits)

May we all have greater freedoms of places to visit and be in the near future.

Denyse.

Link Up #257. 5 Years Old.

Life This Week. Link Up #257.

You can link up something old or new, just come on in.

* Please add just ONE post each week! NOT a link-up series of posts, or multiple posts. Thank you.

* Feel free to go with the prompt for the week to add your ‘take’ on the prompt. Or not.

* Please do stay to comment on my post as I always reply. It’s a kind connection I value as a blogger! 

* Check out what others are up to: Leave a comment on a few posts, because we all love our comments, right!

* Add a link back to this blog in your post somewhere, or on your sidebar or let others know somewhere you are linking up to this blog’s Life This Week.

*Posts deemed by me, the owner of the blog & the link-up, to be unsuitable for my audience will be deleted without notice. These may include promotions, advertorials, sales and any that are overly religious or political or in any way offensive in nature.

Next week’s optional prompt: Unusual. 38/51. Mr Whelan is back with Time. Part Two So Optional Prompt Not Used.

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Finding Geometric Shapes In Nature. #SundayStills Meets #TreeSquare. 90/2021.

Finding Geometric Shapes In Nature. #SundayStills Meets #TreeSquare. 90/2021.

 

As this post farewells #TreeSquare via #SundayStills I am summing up the four weeks like this:

  • who knew if we look more closely just how much there is to see in JUST one tree
  • what I saw as I reviewed my photos of trees and shrubs was the immense detail in each
  • I noticed far more of the shapes and textures too when I was walking near the trees I selected for photos
  • I will never be bored outside while there is a tree to look at
  • I appreciate their role in our lives..literally keeping us alive more than ever.

Thank you for Becky for a month of #TreeSquare. I shall be checking out what’s happening next time round.

Thank you too, Terri, for your prompts for Sunday Stills.

Allow me to share what I saw as geometric in these images.

Lines, angles and spheres.

 

Patterns: squares on ground, curves and some trees cut into spherical shapes.

 

I see conical shapes in the conifer and angled sprouts from each branch.

 

I did not make this…but someone had fun with this pine tree making a mandala!

 

The lines in the rails of the horse training track taking the eye to the tree, as it casts shadows.

 

My deliberate use of fence palings to split this image into three separate rectangles.

 

The bamboo stretches against the railings and scaffolding of the building under construction next door to my Dad’s Unit Complex

 

The angles and lines that take the eye of the viewer to the monument, on a very bleak day when Covid has struck in 2020 and services would not be held here for A.N.Z.A.C. Day. The tree in the background lends some comfort to the stark sight.

 

I can no longer look at a tree without seeing the angles of the branches.

 

I look forward to seeing what Terri has planned for August. August?? How did we get here so fast?

Sending my best to you all.

Denyse.

 

 

 

 

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Women of Courage Series. #64. Anne Howe. 89/2021.

Women of Courage Series. #64. Anne Howe. 89/2021.

In July 2021 The Women of Courage posts will be connected in some way to World Head and Neck Cancer Month (July) and the #WHNCD Day on 27 July 2021. Those who have followed my blog since 2017 know I was diagnosed with a rare Head and Neck Cancer in my upper gums and under the top lip. More here.

Two years ago….around this time of year, I tentatively courageously launched Women of Courage series on my blog and here was what I said then:

I got this idea from attending the Newcastle Writers Festival in April 2019 and hearing the wonderful Jane Caro speak about her book Accidental Feminists. IF you ever get a chance to listen to or read Jane’s works they are very good.

What I considered after that day and in the days to come is how we women have a tendency to underplay our achievements and whatever else we are doing in our lives. I know this is changing.

This third series of blog posts on Denyse Whelan Blogs to be found here will continue to be published each Thursday.

Here is the introduction to the series.

Courage is strength in the face of pain or grief. It’s doing something that frightens you. We face situations that demand courage every day. These situations provide us with choices, and the way we respond to those choices determines our future. Dayne Shuda

Whilst Anne Howe, who is in her late 60s, and I have not met in real life, we have connected on-line via a very supportive facebook group for those affected by Head and Neck Cancer. The details are below. Anne’s story looks short yet it is incredibly full of courage from Anne’s words, taking the best chance you can as a human to survive a devastating diagnosis and allowing those who have your trust to do their best for you. Anne is a very determined woman, loved by her large family and often a carer to others. She has had more surgery since her post-HNC photo was taken and this has been, as best as it might happen, for her to have some teeth added inside her mouth.

Note from Anne:

 While I have had teeth made I am unable to wear them until I have had the screws implanted in my jaw and the bridging work made. Then its fingers crossed to hope my jaws don’t crumble due to the radiation. So still a way to go there.

I chose to use both images supplied by Anne as they do illustrate her words at the end of her story. I have, though, used her image before the surgeries for her Woman of Courage collage because it was then she needed to have all the courage she could muster to go through her many trials in her head and neck cancer journey.

Thank you, Anne. Let’s share your responses now.

 

 

 

What have you faced in your life where you have had to be courageous?

My moment of courage kicked in when I presented for surgery to remove a SCC (squamous cell carcinoma) tumour from my nose back in 2017.

I was nervous and terrified as anyone is when facing surgery but the full impact hit when my surgeon came to see me.

His first words when explaining my surgery really tore through me.

He could NOT give me informed consent.

I would have to trust him and he promised to do the very best he could for me.

At best he would remove the tumour and do his best to repair the damage but at worst I could just wake up with a hole in my face.

With a very shaking hand I signed on  the line but while doing it a very gentle hand covered mine and a gentle voice told me he would take good care of me.

I woke up to find I had lost most of my nose, my top lip up to the nose, some of my left cheek, my central upper jaw and part of the soft palate.

 

How did this change you in any way? Please outline further if this has been the case.

After my surgery I was informed by my surgeon that I was stage 4 and he didn’t think I would survive.

He had done his best to get me this far and I made up my mind to do whatever I needed to do to get through this which is exactly what I have done.

I knew I had a long hard road ahead with a lot of work to be done.

Over the last 4 years I have endured 11 surgeries on my nose and 30 sessions of radiation.

I still have further nasal surgery to have and also surgery on my mouth due to having lost part of my jaw. (this is some of  the surgery I mentioned in my introduction)

 

Is there something you learned from this that you could recommend to help others who need courage?

When I woke up from surgery and first  saw my face I thought that was it.

Never in my wildest imagination did I think it could be repaired to the stage it has.

I put my faith and trust in my surgeon which was the best thing I could ever have done.

The other thing that helped get me through was the love and support of my family and friends.

 

Do you think you are able to be more courageous now if the life situation calls for it? Why is that?

I have learned from this experience that I am stronger than I ever thought I was.

I have often been told I am very brave but I disagree.

I have fears just like everyone else but to survive I just had to put on my big girl pants and do what was needed as the other option just didn’t bear thinking about.

It really was a live or die situation.

Over time my strength has just grown.

 

Is there any message you would give to others facing a situation where courage could be needed?

To anyone going through something that fills you with fear or concern my advice is to give everything you have because only then can you say you really tried.

Surround yourself with some people who will truly understand and accept you no matter what.

Sometimes I have needed to vent or just have a good cry to let those emotions out and that is important too.

Never give up.

 

My favourite saying through all this has been:

My face does not define me I am still the same person.

Anne, your courage and your story blow me away. What a great relationship you have with your surgeon. Trust is so much a part of it. I am so glad you are here, and looking after your family too…as you continue to recover. Thank you so much.

Denyse.

Note About Head and Neck Cancer Support on-line.

IF a family member or someone you know does have a diagnosis of a head and neck cancer or that person is a carer, the value of a good facebook group cannot be over-done. The friendly space that IS this group for eligible people to request membership is a good one. There are people from all over the world but the group is not huge so personal connections can be made. It is mainly made up of New Zealanders, and Aussies too…along with those from the U.S. There are questions to be answered to join and it IS strictly for those with a head and neck cancer. Link is here.

This is a link to Head and Neck Cancer Australia too. This is where I found information initially after my 2017 diagnosis and where I am now an Ambassador.

Joining with Natalie here for Weekend Coffee Share.

Copyright © 2021 denysewhelan.com.au – All rights reserved.

 

 

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Women of Courage Series. #63. Cosette Calder. 86/2021.

Women of Courage Series. #63. Cosette Calder. 86/2021.

In July 2021 The Women of Courage posts will be connected in some way to World Head and Neck Cancer Month (July) and the #WHNCD Day on 27 July 2021. Those who have followed my blog since 2017 know I was diagnosed with a rare Head and Neck Cancer in my upper gums and under the top lip. More here.

Two years ago….around this time of year, I tentatively courageously launched Women of Courage series on my blog and here was what I said then:

I got this idea from attending the Newcastle Writers Festival in April 2019 and hearing the wonderful Jane Caro speak about her book Accidental Feminists. IF you ever get a chance to listen to or read Jane’s works they are very good.

What I considered after that day and in the days to come is how we women have a tendency to underplay our achievements and whatever else we are doing in our lives. I know this is changing.

This third series of blog posts on Denyse Whelan Blogs to be found here will continue to be published each Thursday.

Here is the introduction to the series.

Courage is strength in the face of pain or grief. It’s doing something that frightens you. We face situations that demand courage every day. These situations provide us with choices, and the way we respond to those choices determines our future. Dayne Shuda

Those of us who have been diagnosed with a head and neck cancer never feel quite alone when there are others we can share our stories and one such place is a special facebook group (private, but ask to join) here based in New Zealand. This is where I virtually met Cosette Calder, aged 46, and she was someone I reached out to share her story of head and neck cancer, and here she is. Thank you Cosette.

 

 

What have you faced in your life where you have had to be courageous?

  • In 2015 I was diagnosed with throat cancer.
  • I had a young family, full time job and life was busy.
  • Suddenly everything stopped and I had to undergo Chemo and Radiation Treatment to beat this cancer and have a chance to live.

 

How did this change you in any way? Please outline further if this has been the case.

  • I had a brutal cancer treatment.
  • I couldn’t eat food and had to have a tube inserted into my stomach.
  • For two months I only drank water and was tube fed.
  • I lost 8kgs and some of my hair fell out.
  • I really had to dig deep to get through this treatment.
  • I had a plastic mask made of my head and shoulders.
  • This mask was for the radiation treatment.
  • My head had to be perfectly still on the radiation table so the mask was bolted across my face to the table for 20 minutes a day during radiation treatment.
  • It is incredibly scary and claustrophobic.
  • I somehow managed it.
  • I am proud of myself for the courage of wearing the mask when I was so ill and feeling down.
  • I fought hard whilst being so unwell. I didn’t realise I could be so strong.

 

Is there something you learned from this that you could recommend to help others who need courage?

  • Keep putting one foot in front of the other.
  • Sometimes we can’t help what happens to us.
  • Keep moving on and keep trying.
  • Acceptance too helps.
  • By accepting my cancer diagnosis I was able to focus and keep moving ahead.

 

Do you think you are able to be more courageous now if the life situation calls for it? Why is that?

  • I am stronger now.
  • I have been pushed to the limit and I know how lucky I am to be here.

 

Is there any message you would give to others facing a situation where courage could be needed?

  • You CAN do it!

 

Oh my, yes we do have brutal treatments don’t we?

However, in reading this of your experience as a head and neck cancer patient Cosette, and, now well-recovered, it is a tribute to your human qualities of strength and courage that you have recovered and now share your story. Thank you again. I am sharing the information below from the New Zealand Based Facebook Group for Head & Neck Cancers. Thanks to for all you do to share awareness!

Denyse.

Note About Head and Neck Cancer Support on-line.

IF a family member or someone you know does have a diagnosis of a head and neck cancer or that person is a carer, the value of a good facebook group cannot be over-done. The friendly space that IS this group for eligible people to request membership is a good one. There are people from all over the world but the group is not huge so personal connections can be made. It is mainly made up of New Zealanders, and Aussies too…along with those from the U.S. There are questions to be answered to join and it IS strictly for those with a head and neck cancer. Link is here.

This is a link to Head and Neck Cancer Australia too. This is where I found information initially after my 2017 diagnosis and where I am now an Ambassador.

Joining with Natalie here for Weekend Coffee Share.

Copyright © 2021 denysewhelan.com.au – All rights reserved.

 

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