Tuesday 19th October 2021

Self Care Stories #6. #WomenofCourage 1/2. 42/51 #LifeThisWeek. 122/2021.

Self Care Stories #6. #WomenofCourage 1/2. 42/51 #LifeThisWeek. 122/2021.

In this week’s self care stories the words are not about me.

All the stories from the Women of Courage series are here.

They are about these women noted here and what they shared as Women of Courage back in 2019 for what became known as Series 1.

Further on are some of the women from 2020, which became Series 2.  In the final post where I will wrap the remainder of the women’s stories from 2020 and then those who were part of Series 3 which ended in September 2021.

 

How did Women of Courage start?

I am  introducing the series with  examples from (my!) life. That post will go live on Wednesday 15 May 2019.

After that, at certain intervals,  other “women of courage”, will be having their stories shared via a post here.

It is a goal of mine as a blogger to connect us all and to share our stories.

Thank you for your interest as a reader and commenter here.

I look forward to this series as the year proceeds and we all get to read about some different and wonderful:

                                 Women of Courage

And then what happened?

I am excited, interested and curious about these stories from real life…and women of courage!

I hope you are too.

If you would like to share your story of being a woman of courage* please let me know in the comments and I will email you. That would be great!

*there are no men included as I  think we women do not talk or not write about our stories enough which is why I have called the series: Women of Courage.

This woman here, Jane Caro AM, author, mother, and more, is a friend and I was delighted to hear her speak about the book Accidental Feminists which struck a chord for me, given my age and stage in life. I then put a post out about me, and already asked some people from the world of blogging to share their stories, and away it went.

Thank you to women of courage:

It had its challenges getting answers of Yes/No?Can I Get Back To You?/I Am Not Courageous…but I accepted all whose answers arrived.

Then if there had been an agreement to add their story, I sent off the same five questions to all.

 

Questions from Denyse:

  • What have you faced in your life where you have had to be courageous?
  • How did this change you in any way? Please outline further if this has been the case.
  • Is there something you learned from this that you could recommend to help others who need courage?
  • Do you think you are able to be more courageous now if the life situation calls for it?
  • Why is that?Is there any message you would give to others facing a situation where courage could be needed?

And then waited for responses. Some came fast, others came slowly but in the end 74 women shared! Not all used their real names and that of course was fine.

2019: Series One.

2020: Part of Series Two.

 

I pay particular tribute to dear friend and artist, Tracey Fletcher King who recently died.

Tracey had been an amazing and inclusive art teacher and I ‘met’ her virtually when I did classes with her in 2015. I knew then she had cancer but was free of it for some time.

Sadly, then around 2016 into 2017, hers became a nasty one, and she required on-going chemo which came at a price. Her last art exhibition was a monumental occasion and struggle but she achieved her goal to hold it. She supported me from day one of my cancer diagnosis and was a generous friend to me and many.

She was determined she share her story while she could, and because I am highlighting her here, this is the direct link. Vale Tracey. This is classic Tracey art…blue and white, and fruit. From her website.

 

Now on the right hand side of my blog’s home page, here is the roll for Women of Courage 1-37.

    1. 1. Sam Colden
    2. 2. Megan Blandford
    3. 3. Katherine
    4. 4. Debbie Harris
    5. 5. Kirsty Russell
    6. 6. Annette
    7. 7. Dorothy
    8. 8. Leanne
    9. 9. Min
    10. 10. Tegan Churchill
    11. 11. Kirsten
    12. 12. Megan Daley
    13. 13. Alicia
    14. 14. Veronica
    15. 15. Deborah
    16. 16. Sarah
    17. 17. Lydia C. Lee
    18. 18. Margaret Jolly
    19. 19. Jan Wild
    20. 20. Tracey Fletcher King
    21. 21. Deb Morton
    22. 22. Joanne
    23. 23. Lisa Greissl
    24. 24. Grace Titioka
    25. 25. Anonymous
    26. 26. Maureen Jansen
    27. 27. Sandra Kelly
    28. 28. Beth Macdonald
    29. 29. Lorna Gordon
    30. 30. Jayde
    31. 31.Cathy
    32. 32. Sue Loncaric
    33. 33. Sanch
    34. 34. Rebecca Bowyer
    35. 35. Jennifer Jones
    36. 36. Anonymous
    37. 37. Kathy

If your story is here, why not go back to the page here  and have a read to check out what you shared then.

Warm wishes to all,

Denyse.

Link Up #262.

Life This Week. Link Up #262.

You can link up something old or new, just come on in.

* Please add just ONE post each week! NOT a link-up series of posts, or multiple posts. Thank you.

* Feel free to go with the prompt for the week to add your ‘take’ on the prompt. Or not.

* Please do stay to comment on my post as I always reply. It’s a kind connection I value as a blogger! 

* Check out what others are up to: Leave a comment on a few posts, because we all love our comments, right!

* Add a link back to this blog in your post somewhere, or on your sidebar or let others know somewhere you are linking up to this blog’s Life This Week.

*Posts deemed by me, the owner of the blog & the link-up, to be unsuitable for my audience will be deleted without notice. These may include promotions, advertorials, sales and any that are overly religious or political or in any way offensive in nature.

Next Week’s Optional Prompt: X Marks the Spot. My post will be Part 2/2 of Women of Courage. Recap.

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Water. 41/51 #LifeThisWeek. 121/2021.

Water. 41/51 #LifeThisWeek. 121/2021.

I admit that water is my favourite drink and tends to be from a bottle. It is a small one that I can fit into my bag. I buy these bottles in bulk from the supermarket and then  re-fill for a time. With both of us ageing, and dry mouths from time to time, each of us needs a sip or two when we are out in the car or waiting…at the doctor’s for one. I also have to have water nearby to help any food that may not want to go down with ease. That is the legacy of the reconstruction of my mouth inside

This post however  moves away from the practical and necessary aspects of water to these images;

 

 

Papa aka Bernard caring for the pool water whilst grandkids LOVE the fun. 2014. We had pools in almost all of our backyards and this one was particularly loved by little ones as we had a ‘beach area’ where they could play and feel safe (under an adult’s eye) until ready to strike out into the deeper water.

Love this shot of Miss 4

 

We lived in north-western Sydney and there was a man-made lake nearby – Bella Vista and it was somewhere pleasant to walk around the board walk and look at the ducks – very overfed – and perhaps get a milkshake and donut afterwards. Back in 2014. Miss GD (who photographed our pre- Wedding Anniversary shots) with her lil sis who is now 9.

 

One granddaughter (#7 grandchild, #5 granddaughter) was being born….as this extremely wet day poured water everywhere…I was driving back home and would find out once I was there, she had been born back in 2013.

And some favourites from now and the past….

Then there was this:

A young grandson into the water at the beach. His grandfather was not far away. Soon after we had moved to the coast he had a special stay in January 2015.

Oh….and yesterday was  his 14th Birthday!!

 

Then there is this view…from inside the Sydney Opera House, of Sydney Harbour. A big favourite of mine and many in the water stakes. I was attending TedX 2015.

 

As a family we all enjoy being near or on the water. Not everyone likes the waves and current of the surf (and we oldies would say that now too) but as younger adults both B and I loved to surf. Both of us spent our formative years by the ocean.

 

And then there is this: my favourite place to visit: summer, winter and all the in-between times. The roaring winds, the gentle waves, the sand where I walk…and perhaps the water where I paddle all help to ground me and help me focus on “now”….this image of me, taken in June 2017 just after my cancer diagnosis and before any surgeries. I think I was pretty determined to come here to make more memories and to help me have those to view for what was ahead. It was a good plan.

But then: how wonderful, some 3 years later, to be taking an image of Avoca Beach at sunset before speaking at a head and neck cancer fundraiser ball….

 

I could find more images but suffice to say, I love being by the water. I am also respectful of water where levels may rise quickly in heavy rain. It’s a wonderful resource but being from nature we need to be careful of it too. I would never go into the sea here and it’s easy to see how powerful that surf is and how some rock fishing people can be swept off rocks…

I admit this is a bit of an emotional way to finish. My Dad, is well over 97, and has been in lockdown at Dee Why in his independent retirement unit for as long as we have. Hopefully I will be visiting him as this post goes live or in that week.

Dad (in this image, in blue shirt) walked at Manly, on the beach for years and years before Mum died in 2007 and then probably tended to walk along the paths to and from Fairy Bower. He loves this place.

He grew up in Wollongong near the water so it’s always been special for him. We have talked about where his ashes may go after his death…and this maybe where. Not that he is going anywhere soon.

I am a fan of water that is for sure.

And here is a special short video taken of the water about 20 minutes from home:

How about you?

Denyse.

Link Up #261.

Life This Week. Link Up #261.

You can link up something old or new, just come on in.

* Please add just ONE post each week! NOT a link-up series of posts, or multiple posts. Thank you.

* Feel free to go with the prompt for the week to add your ‘take’ on the prompt. Or not.

* Please do stay to comment on my post as I always reply. It’s a kind connection I value as a blogger! 

* Check out what others are up to: Leave a comment on a few posts, because we all love our comments, right!

* Add a link back to this blog in your post somewhere, or on your sidebar or let others know somewhere you are linking up to this blog’s Life This Week.

*Posts deemed by me, the owner of the blog & the link-up, to be unsuitable for my audience will be deleted without notice. These may include promotions, advertorials, sales and any that are overly religious or political or in any way offensive in nature.

Next week’s Optional Prompt: 42/51 Self Care Stories #6. 18 Oct. Link Up #262 

I will be doing a Part One of Two Tribute to the Women of Courage series. Part Two will be the following Monday.

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Share Your Snaps.#8. 40/51#LifeThisWeek.120/2021.

Share Your Snaps.#8. 40/51#LifeThisWeek. 120/2021.

Every 5th Week on Mondays

This is the month just past of September 2021 where I determined I needed a challenge. I thought of this:

#ShareSeptember

#oneword

#onephoto

I invited friends and bloggers to join in to #shareseptember as part of Instagram posts and these lovely people did: Thank you!

Their instagram handles are next to each name.

Debbie: @debs__world

Sue: @womenlivingwellafter50

Jo: @jotracey

Christie: @christiehawkes

Jennifer: @jenniferalisonjones

Marilyn: @downmarilyn

Susanne: @susanneguitar

Leanne: @leanne_d_b

One Word Selections. One Photo Too.

I had the idea to do this after reading Comfort (not yet finished) by Matt Haig where he wrote of taking time to notice, or be or find one beautiful thing. I included that page in this photo challenge.

Every one of us will find meaning in words and the challenge was to find a photo which meant something to you about that word. I know I looked inward quite a bit and sought photos from less recent times as I had tended to have already shared them.

I also wanted to add more creativity to my #ShareSeptember and chose to print each photo and then mount it onto a square card of my art work. I photographed that and then, over time using two different photo apps I added the frame and the print out to look like dymo tape. It was good to have more to distract me in lockdown so the complications I added were for that very reason.

In the instagram post I would add my details about the why of the image, and I also used an art journal to add them, and then write more. In other words, I kept a record that is more than just about photos.

And what came together well on-line, because following social media can be a challenge (ha! that word again!) so the use of #ShareSeptember by all those who took part and some who kindly added my name so I saw your images daily meant we got to connect.

Thank you all.

It was fun and I enjoyed connecting. By the time this post goes live my instagram account where I had this challenge is being deleted. I explained last week. However, I have the records here and I am grateful for that.

If you wish to follow me on Instagram it’s @denysewhelan_blogs and this is my avatar while the change is happening from two to one.

 

 

Thank you to my friends from social media who took part in #ShareSeptember.

Did you know my instagram account for @denysewhelan_blogs links to the right hand side column of the blog?

I am, as I promised myself, slowing down to take more time to connect in person and have more time to enjoy outside and whilst there will be photos shared…I wouldn’t know who I was if I did not, I am not making up any new challenges!

Update: Over the past days I have been oh so slowly deleting MANY of my photos from social media: Instagram and Facebook, including the Facebook page Denyse Whelan Blogs. Why? I have shared many images over the past few years. More than anything, to connect with others and to share my progress with head and neck cancer. I also need connections. However, in my new goal of going more slowly and blogging less, I will be sharing on social media less…for ONE very good reason. Every image shared on Facebook and Instagram becomes theirs until “I” delete it. And, to delete it, there is only ONE way…one image at a time. I have found after about 15-20 times, the system stops deleting. I found I had high 100s of photos which were duplicated because I shared to Facebook as well as on Instagram. Now, I am much wiser…and over this detailed action. Believe me, there is no multiple ways of deleting. 

Take care,

Denyse.

P.S. This is now Daylight Saving in parts of Australia. Where I live in N.S.W. we have just put the clocks forward one hour for next 6 months. It creates a lot of confusion at times and I am pretty sure my Queensland friends have an opinion on “not taking part” in Daylight Saving. And I know those in Western Australia …and perhaps NT, are maybe happier without it. It IS all an individual’s response!

Link Up #260.

Life This Week. Link Up #260.

You can link up something old or new, just come on in.

* Please add just ONE post each week! NOT a link-up series of posts, or multiple posts. Thank you.

* Feel free to go with the prompt for the week to add your ‘take’ on the prompt. Or not.

* Please do stay to comment on my post as I always reply. It’s a kind connection I value as a blogger! 

* Check out what others are up to: Leave a comment on a few posts, because we all love our comments, right!

* Add a link back to this blog in your post somewhere, or on your sidebar or let others know somewhere you are linking up to this blog’s Life This Week.

*Posts deemed by me, the owner of the blog & the link-up, to be unsuitable for my audience will be deleted without notice. These may include promotions, advertorials, sales and any that are overly religious or political or in any way offensive in nature.

Next week’s optional prompt: Water 41/51 

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View. 39/51. #LifeThisWeek. 118/2021.

View. 39/51. #LifeThisWeek. 118/2021.

This post will take a look at ‘view’ the word about seeing and perhaps a ‘point of view’. Using images and words I found of interest in my archives.

And with an update from me at the very end…about Self Care.

 

 

Bernard looking at the view: for whales! None sighted.

 

Papa & 3 Grandkids viewing the water…and seeing ‘little fishies” 2015.

 

This view, of my talented granddaughter who enjoys photography, as she checks an image via the viewfinder. Sydney 2014.

 

The view of me…last one in any kind of education role. Viewed at a TeachMeet in 2015 at the High School I attended 1962-1967. I spoke about my life in education.

 

A not-unfamilar view to regular readers…this is Soldiers Beach in late 2015 with my visiting granddaughters in view.

 

Sunny view of yachts in the background with us having a morning out with a view to greater connection amidst lots of change in 2014.

 

Is it even a session with lego unless you make a tower? Papa pleasing these 2 back in 2016. Great view!

 

Cheers Miss 2. My view of her in 2012. Out for morning tea.

 

Look at that view, as grandson takes photo with my camera. What I view too is protective arm of Miss 5 around her younger sister. 2016.

 

My view then…2015, remembering my view of room on right near. My home room in high school 1962! I got the tour before I gave my presentation.

 

I didn’t notice this view till I was finding photos. When Ms 2 stayed with us, she put her sandals next to Papa’s. 2016.

 

The place we moved to had a great view over the water. The house was too uncomfortable and expensive for us in 2015 so we moved on.

 

Teacher & Grandma Me loved this view. Miss 15 months trying out pencils. Go Miss E!

 

So long ago we did this none of remember accurately but we think about 20 years ago. The view from Sydney Harbour Bridge as part of Bridge Climb was amazing.

 

I have viewed this scene over and over and in real life many times. Back to Manly in 2013 for an early morning walk around the area with an interstate visitor.

 

This view, of the now-demolished Entertainment Centre in 2014, is of my eldest granddaughter in her solo role as part of the School Spectacular.

 

The view of the Hollywood sign in January 2006…so far away! Such a different view to what we expect as tourists.

 

My current view…and views of my life as I face turning 72 in 2 months.

These four images, all with ‘me’ inside are part of the story of what I have been, done and needed to be ready for over the past four and a half years since my head and neck cancer diagnosis in May 2017. Blog updates are here.

These times gave me many chances to display courage, admit overwhelm, be able to keep going and…as I often said “do the hard things.”

My blog, and social media have helped me greatly over this time to distract me and to provide comfort as well as to connect.

Now, as I face a YEAR ahead with no check ups for cancer, no plans for any other health issues to need my attention other than the usual checks with G.P. and dentist, I am feeling an air of relief and release.

So, this is how I am going to make some changes. Remembering self care and adapting to managing my life as I age. 

 

  • From next week, I will be blogging ONCE a week. On Mondays for Life This Week. I have posts planned ahead and this is a good thing for planner me!

 

  • I have decided to discontinue further blogging challenges for this year, which means that I have stopped Sunday Stills as of this past week. I have loved being part of the Sunday Stills community and thought I would see the year through, but no, I am making the choice to stop now and have written to Terri at Second Wind Leisure about this and appreciate the friendliness of her community.

 

  • I will also no longer linking up with Natalie for Weekend Coffee share by the time of the final Woman of Courage story and wish her all the best. It’s been a great community to meet and I have connected with Natalie too about this decision. Thank you Natalie.

 

 

  • I am discontinuing one of my instagram accounts.

 

  • I have had quite a lot of trouble with instagram since the end of 2019 where “they” won’t let me post from my phone nor recognise the @denysewhelan account unless it’s via @denysewhelan_blogs so, with the end of #ShareSeptember I will be deleting this account. I may be able to transfer some images over but I am not that concerned about it.

 

  • To be honest, Instagram was a favourite of mine until Facebook took over. Now, I will continue to post on @denysewhelan_blogs and do ask for a follow there if you don’t already follow me. I keep my account private because I was hacked in 2017.

 

  • I will keep that account because it is linked (so far no issues) to my blog and to my Denyse Whelan Blogs Facebook page.

 

 

@DenyseWhelan will be deleted at the end of September 2021 on Instagram.

 

This is the new avatar with the ‘old’ one for @denysewhelan_blogs. Do ask for a follow! Thank you

 

Thank you for you support as I make these changes.

I cannot truthfully write about self care unless practising it so this is my story.

How do you practise self care as you move forward in life?

Denyse.

Link Up #259.

Life This Week. Link Up #259.

You can link up something old or new, just come on in.

* Please add just ONE post each week! NOT a link-up series of posts, or multiple posts. Thank you.

* Feel free to go with the prompt for the week to add your ‘take’ on the prompt. Or not.

* Please do stay to comment on my post as I always reply. It’s a kind connection I value as a blogger! 

* Check out what others are up to: Leave a comment on a few posts, because we all love our comments, right!

* Add a link back to this blog in your post somewhere, or on your sidebar or let others know somewhere you are linking up to this blog’s Life This Week.

*Posts deemed by me, the owner of the blog & the link-up, to be unsuitable for my audience will be deleted without notice. These may include promotions, advertorials, sales and any that are overly religious or political or in any way offensive in nature.

Next week’s optional prompt: 40/51 Share Your Snaps.

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Unusual*. Here’s Time Part 2* Instead. 38/51. #LifeThisWeek. 115/2021.

Unusual*. Here’s Time Part 2* Instead. 38/51. #LifeThisWeek. 115/2021.

Rather than go with the word ‘unusual’ for the optional prompt, it’s Part Two: Time…and this is a post from my husband Bernard who recently wrote ‘on prompt’ Time here. 

For those who may need a refresher about Bernard, his first post for the blog is found here. 

Thank you Bernard for offering more of your thoughts, experiences and wisdom.

Can you believe how much TIME had passed since we did this trip back to Tamworth? No, me neither. Enough chit-chat.

Bit early…Celebrating 50 years since we met: October 2020.

 

Part 2: The Time Is NOW

 Thanks for re-joining me in this moment of time.

Time has many metaphors. Lydia talked about the very interesting wheel of time. I like the metaphor that sees time as a never-ending and continual flow of water such as the surf. At any point, by dipping your hand in the water, you experience the drops of water at that time. Those drops represent the moments that you have available to you at that time; the only moments. You notice that they can be very difficult to hold onto and how quickly the water flows on never to be experienced again. They symbolise the ‘ah-hah’ moments in our lives.

 

This experience sets of a “ah-hah’ moment as you realise just how precious and limited your time is.

This really impresses you. It is a lightning strike moment. It is the NOW effect (Goldstein)!

 

Well-known holocaust survivor and psychiatrist Dr Victor Frankl  talked of the space that exists between stimulus and response.

In that space you have the power to choose your response. This enables our personal growth and freedom.

Elisha Goldstein, PhD., talks of this as our NOW time, sometimes described as ‘ah-hah’ moments that can change our lives.

For example, you may hear of a friend’s death.

At this time you are reminded of the love you feel for family.

Or hear that your part of the world is to be shut down because of nasty viral pandemic.

Whatever the stimulus, the NOW space turns our minds and hearts to what we really value in life.

There’s the argument that, in the fullness of time, we will come to realise how it has had the Now Effect of re-focussing us on what we really value.

 

So, what are the possible outcomes of this ‘ah-hah’ moment. Hopefully that:

 

  • You understand your life is a constant stream of stimuli and responses.
  • You realise that, by attending to the present you can take full advantage of the space to change what is not currently working for you in your life.
  • You understand that the significance of your life is not tied to the acquisition of material things and social status. That it is totally about the quality of the relationships you have with other human beings, especially those closest to you.
  • You realise that attending too much to past events is detracting from the present with the added deficit of possibly sending you down those old rabbit holes and causing distress.
  • You realise that, what is now history, is NOW, no longer within your control.
  • You are aware that worrying about what’s going to happen in the future sucks as you cannot control it either.
  • You understand the only moments you can control, albeit, with varying degrees of difficulty, are those that you are living in right NOW.

 

Views on time.

William Penn (founder of Pennsylvania) believed that “ time was what we most want and yet, use worst”.

While I tend to agree, I also believe that it doesn’t have to be that way.

In fact, it’s fair to say that there are many people who would feel a little offended by the statement.

People, such as those who have taken the conscious decision to organise their present moments with a view to living their lives most efficiently and effectively. In so doing, they maximise their feeling of contentment.

 

In all likelihood, these people will tick most of the following boxes:

 

  • They understand and welcome full ownership of their allocation of time.
  • They accept that those moments will contain ups and downs but are happy to take what’s on offer.
  • They also understand that that time is THEIRS to control as they see fit.
  • They look forward to the opportunity to spend more time in the NOW space.
  • When triggers occur they take advantage of that space to respond thoughtfully with generosity of spirit and kindness of heart, rather that react with negative emotion.
  • They understand that the pressure time can create is minimised commensurately by their level of efficiency in the use of their time.
  • They understand the need to take time away from their ‘doing selves’ to just ‘be’. After all, we are, first and foremost, human beings!
  • They understand that their quality of life is enhanced by paying attention to every moment with curiosity, openness and flexibility.
  • They understand that living mindfully in the present is key to enhancing quality of life.

These realisations – ‘ah-hah’ moments – emanate from being present and engaged. They come from seeing ‘doing’ and ‘being’ as mutually important in their lives. Living mindfully in the present is not difficult. However, like learning to play a musical instrument, it requires practice!  Try the exercises below. They just may help.

Being present and engaged exercise …

 

  1. Take thirty seconds to sit back, relax and simply notice all that you can hear. Firstly, focus on your own breathing and any of your movements. Then, expand your awareness to sounds around you appreciating them as a musician appreciates music noticing differences in volume, pitch, rhythms, harmonies, diminuendos and crescendos.

 

  1. Now, take thirty seconds to look around and notice five things that you can see. Notice each image’s shape, colour, texture, shading, shadows, reflections and highlights. Look at each with the curiosity of never having seen it before.

 

  1. Now, sit up straight and notice the position of your body. Push down firmly on the floor, straighten your spine and relax your shoulders. Take thirty seconds to scan your body from head to toe noticing the feeling in each part. Do this with curiosity of a radiologist looking at an x-ray.

 

  1. Finally, take another thirty seconds to flexibly focus your attention, moving from your body to what you can see and then to what you can hear.

 

 Reflect: What did you notice happen? Did you become more present; more aware of your body and surroundings?

 

Some Simple Ways to Be Present

Strategies to practise daily that centre you and connect you with the world around you; especially when you find yourself hooked by thoughts and feelings.

  1. Take Ten Breaths
  • Take ten slow, deep breaths. Focus on completely emptying your lungs as slowly as possible. The, allow them to refill by themselves.
  • Notice the emptying and refilling sensations of your lungs. Notice what happens with your rib cage and shoulders.
  • Try to allow any thoughts to float down the stream or come and go as passing cars.
  • Expand your awareness to simultaneously noticing your breathing and body movements. The, observe all that you can hear, see, smell, touch and feel.
  1. Dropping Anchor
  • Plant your feet into the floor.
  • Push them down noticing the feel of the supportive floor beneath you.
  • Notice the muscle tension in your legs as you push down.
  • Notice what is happening in your whole body.
  • Look around and take in what you can see, hear, where you are and what you’re doing.
  1. Notice Five Things
  • Pause for a moment
  • Look around and note five things you can see.
  • Listen carefully to hear five
  • Note five things that you can feel in contact with your body, e.g. watch against your wrist, trousers against your legs, air touching your face, back against the chair, feet on the floor, etc.
  • Now, do all the above simultaneously.

 

A final offering from one of the very wise Buddhas.

‘Do not dwell in the past, nor to dream of the future but, to concentrate the mind on the present moment’.

What better way to illustrate this than an image from Bernard’s daily practice of adding to a challenging jigsaw puzzle.

Thank you once again for a post which is of great interest to us all. I know I needed that refresher and I promise fewer questions and sharing from my social media while you are mindfully engaged in your jigsaw.

Denyse.

Link Up #258.

Life This Week. Link Up #258.

You can link up something old or new, just come on in.

* Please add just ONE post each week! NOT a link-up series of posts, or multiple posts. Thank you.

* Feel free to go with the prompt for the week to add your ‘take’ on the prompt. Or not.

* Please do stay to comment on my post as I always reply. It’s a kind connection I value as a blogger! 

* Check out what others are up to: Leave a comment on a few posts, because we all love our comments, right!

* Add a link back to this blog in your post somewhere, or on your sidebar or let others know somewhere you are linking up to this blog’s Life This Week.

*Posts deemed by me, the owner of the blog & the link-up, to be unsuitable for my audience will be deleted without notice. These may include promotions, advertorials, sales and any that are overly religious or political or in any way offensive in nature.

Next week’s optional prompt: View 39/51 

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Taking Stock #4 37/51 #LifeThisWeek. 5th Birthday Edition. 112/2021

Taking Stock #4 37/51 #LifeThisWeek. 5th Birthday Edition. 112/2021.

This Taking Stock is different as I am using images from the 5 years of this link up….

for which I am grateful  and that you, dear blogger and reader  play a very important part…

as it shares some of my stories…

Because back on this day in September 2016 where I posted this…I did not know what lay ahead. I

f you do open the link, you will see it’s a bit like a time capsule. 24 bloggers linked up. Sadly some no longer blog.

Is your name or blog there I wonder?

Present: September 2021.

My focus as a blogger who loves to connect is  summed up in these images on the home page.

I’ve chosen the months of May, September and December for 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, 2020….to take stock!

Whilst  I am not using my A-Z list this time round, I am pretty sure I am using images which spark:

GRATITUDE

LOVE

HEALTH

CONNECTION

APPRECIATION

CARE

MEMORIES

(no meaning in the colours…just used rainbow colours to give headings a different look!) 

Back to: September 2016. When Link Up Began

My dear friend Tanya who makes my blog the colour-filled one it is, and helped me refresh the blog at the beginning of 2016, made this for the link up. Always grateful to her:

Started Life This Week Link Up. Sept 2016.

September 2016.

December 2016.

May 2017.

September 2017.

December 2017.

May 2018.

September 2018

December 2018.

May 2019

September 2019

December 2019

May 2020

September 2020

December 2020

May 2021

September 2021

On 7th September 2021 I had great news from my head and neck cancer surgical team that because my mouth looks good inside, I don’t need to return to them for another YEAR and that visit will be my last. I can scarcely believe it. Yes, so grateful of course and yes to all the support many here have given me….so here’s to good health for us all: Click on the link, please:

https://youtu.be/N91kCMHTzEA

Thank you for being here, whether from the start of the link up or as the years have gone on.

Delighted to announce that I will continue my Monday Link Up for 2022.

I have the plans in readiness for a different set of ‘optional prompts’. I have shared them with one blogger already to get a feel for how they might work out and they should do well. As usual they are optional. I will publish a separate post about this in October-November.

Meanwhile:

Stay well

Stay covid-free

And Be Fully Vaccinated (if you can and health permits)

May we all have greater freedoms of places to visit and be in the near future.

Denyse.

Link Up #257. 5 Years Old.

Life This Week. Link Up #257.

You can link up something old or new, just come on in.

* Please add just ONE post each week! NOT a link-up series of posts, or multiple posts. Thank you.

* Feel free to go with the prompt for the week to add your ‘take’ on the prompt. Or not.

* Please do stay to comment on my post as I always reply. It’s a kind connection I value as a blogger! 

* Check out what others are up to: Leave a comment on a few posts, because we all love our comments, right!

* Add a link back to this blog in your post somewhere, or on your sidebar or let others know somewhere you are linking up to this blog’s Life This Week.

*Posts deemed by me, the owner of the blog & the link-up, to be unsuitable for my audience will be deleted without notice. These may include promotions, advertorials, sales and any that are overly religious or political or in any way offensive in nature.

Next week’s optional prompt: Unusual. 38/51. Mr Whelan is back with Time. Part Two So Optional Prompt Not Used.

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Self Care Stories #5. 36/51 #LifeThisWeek. 109/2021.

Self Care Stories #5. 36/51 #LifeThisWeek. 109/2021.

 

I think I will sub-title this with:

  • More of the Ways In Which I Spend Lockdown.
  • And Try Not To Be Too Covid-Cranky. It IS a Thing!
  • That’s Because….We ARE in many ways over it but Delta Strain of Covid has not yet finished…and so:
  • I will be continuing to find ways to Cut Parts of My Hair….Husband can help a little but right now, resisting…

Onward! 

Celebrating 3 years of having my upper prosthesis fitted…it sure does make eating AND smiling AND talking so much easier. Very grateful for that.

But before I do, I have made a small change to my commenting policy on those who link up their posts  for Mondays.

I am someone who wants to diligently comment on her blog. I do, as much as I can, comment on the day in which bloggers comment on my Life This Week posts.

Then I would aim to read and comment on every linked up post on Wednesday evenings once the link up closed.

Now, in the interests of self care, I have given up that rigid practice and now choose to take more time and do it sometime over the next 24 hours or so. Releasing internal pressure! Try it.

And next  week, it’s the link up’s 5th Birthday! Hip Hip Hooray for you all who make it a pretty regular habit of linking up!!

It will be a special Taking Stock from me.

Started Life This Week Link Up. Sept 2016.

Getting Outside Every Day. Somewhere, even if it’s the backyard. If I don’t see and experience some green of nature and some of its colours and shapes I feel deprived and sad. So the fact that I can, legally in Covid times, still drive somewhere to do this is a MUST. I do love it and am so much better in mood for sure.

And I am arting and crafting my way through emotional self care…because this IS always my go-to and makes a difference. Sending the bookmarks to friends (on-line and in real life) has been a personal project I have enjoyed so much. And it’s still happening. Nothing like connecting.

Then there is my responsibility for self care that’s an every day must or I soon feel not great and my poor husband has to put up with my ….whingeing.

Physical care.…and all that means these days.

  • I am going well with my keeping active in walking most days.
  • I have reduced my goals on the apple watch as lockdown brought fewer places where I could walk.
  • I am eating well for my age and mouth restrictions.
  • I have almost given away the notion of the food intake concerns and being obsessed by any kind of difference in my appearance.

I say almost because life-time habits take a long time to diminish.

  • I accept that my mouth and its insides limit my food intake and quantity and I am much better at ‘eye balling’ something and know I can eat it safely.
  • It doesn’t mean I don’t get ‘hungry’ looking at some people’s food posts!

My head and neck cancer seems to be gone and I have a tele health appointment tomorrow.

I have had my dentist and my GP check my mouth out, and have sent images to my team at Chris O’Brien Lifehouse. Fingers crossed they too agree.

The rectal prolapse surgery was the best thing I could have done for my health last year. What a difference it has made to  my life and confidence. Highly recommend it.

Mind you, I mentioned a couple of things to my GP recently and he said..but didn’t quite get the word “ageing” out….for a couple of things but if they worsen do come back

This is the most vital relationship of all, after caring for my health, and that is of my long time husband and best friend.

This is the man I share most of my day with but little of my night. Why is that?

We found many years ago we are both far better at sleeping if we maintain separate rooms and bed.

We have completely different tastes in TV…another reason…and Netflix offers more for him than I…

but in recent times we now have a 30 minute chat and wind down each evening in the bigger bed (mine) and play word games on our I pads and chat.

It’s become a time we both treasure.

Laughing together is a fave!

There it is, my accountability for self care written and shared.

How is your self care these days?

What’s the easiest part for you?

What about the hardest part?

Tell us in the comments.

Warmest wishes to all,

Denyse.

Link Up #256

Life This Week. Link Up #256

You can link up something old or new, just come on in.

* Please add just ONE post each week! NOT a link-up series of posts, thank you.

* Feel free to go with the prompt for the week to add your ‘take’ on the prompt. Or not.

* Please do stay to comment on my post as I always reply. It’s a kind connection I value as a blogger! 

* Check out what others are up to: Leave a comment on a few posts, because we all love our comments, right!

* Add a link back to this blog in your post somewhere, or on your sidebar or let others know somewhere you are linking up to this blog’s Life This Week.

*Posts deemed by me, the owner of the blog & the link-up, to be unsuitable for my audience will be deleted without notice. These may include promotions, advertorials, sales and any that are overly religious or political or in any way offensive in nature.

Next week’s optional prompt: Celebrating 5 years of this Link Up with Taking Stock. Optional Prompt. 37 /51

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35/51 #LifeThisWeek. Telling My Story. Ch. 26. Part 2/3. May-August 2021.106/2021.

Telling My Story. Chapter Twenty Six. 2021. Part 2/3. May – August.

The backstory first:

FOUR years ago now ….I thought it was time, seeing I had a blog, to start writing my story. It was on advice from a blogging friend, now published author that I did. Then, for a long time I did not. Because cancer was diagnosed.

Nevertheless, I eventually returned to the story and now I am at Chapter Twenty Six. Telling the story as 2021 progresses in three parts. Today is Part Two. May-August 2021.

So, in keeping with my ethical approach to all things, I am making the chapters about MY recollections to various changes in life for me, and us, and life as we knew it. I hope I can continue sharing the story without any intentionally negative or hurtful references to others who are in my life as friends and family members. All of the stories to date found here.

And with this chapter, a recent photo…taken overlooking the harbour at Dobroyd near where I grew up close to Manly N.S.W.

 

May 2021.

We had pretty good weather in May. We got outside even more. The covid ‘stuff’ had settled. However, we could never be quite sure of its whereabouts so we did “wearing a mask” when asked inside, and I know I was pretty casual about signing in using the State Government QR code. No-one was really practising social distancing but living on the coast, we did not have too many concerns.

We did not travel to Sydney for Mother’s Day this year even though I could have. It just wasn’t happening.

I got to celebrate my 4 years since my Head and Neck cancer diagnosis with a much anticipated visit to Sydney’s Lyric Theatre where I saw Hamilton.

Yes it was everything I had hoped and more. Wonderful.

That week I also came back to Westmead for a 6 month mouth check with my prosthodontist. All is well.

I stopped on my way home at a cafe in a nursery where I used to meet up with friends in Sydney days. It was lovely but it had changed as had I.

June. What happened?

We were continuing to be lulled into some kind of normality, living without too many restrictions and life was pretty good.

I visited my Dad to celebrate his 10 years living in his independent retirement Unit. He is going well.

I had my 6 months check with my regular dentist and he was very pleased with how well I care for my mouth and 8 teeth now! It’s always a treat going to him because we have such a history and he is a great cheerleader too.

I was delighted to recall that my head and neck cancer nurse, Cate, was a Woman of Courage on the blog too. But….the head and neck cancer group getting to Canberra was not able to happen because of Covid restrictions in Victoria and I took a reality check. The reality check for me was about how I would be able to eat when away from home over 3 nights and it was literally something I need to accept. A future post on eating and drinking challenges post head and neck cancer was planned.

But, we were going OK. In fact we had morning tea out twice using our government’s ‘dine in’ vouchers and I was excitedly planning the Soup for the Soul event with my friends from BluJ’s in Toukley.

 

And then late June 2021, just as the school holidays began, and we got excited about seeing our son and his family to celebrate our newly minted 8 year old’s birthday it was OFF. Back to Lockdown. Because of Covid 19 and ONE person’s infection from the newly seen and very nasty delta strain….it was not a good news day or week. So much changed in a very short time. STAY home. STAY safe. And as I write this ready for 30 August publication we are STILL in same lockdown. It’s actually become much more serious. More on that as I try to recall August! OK, we live on N.S.W. Central Coast, around 2 hours from centre of Sydney the capital of N.S.W. On 27 June 2021 we were declared to be part of Greater Sydney, along with Sydney and all its suburbs, Wollongong and Shellharbour to the south and the Blue Mountains to the west. NB: the Central Coast where we live was declared a regional area mid August.

The Hawkesbury River and Bridge. From the side where I took this photo it’s Central Coast.

July 2021.

July holds many memories for me since 2017. It marks the anniversary of my first head and neck cancer major surgery and reconstruction on 6 July (4 years this year) and 27.7 each year – since 2014, is World Head and Neck Cancer Day.

I met other people who were also head and neck cancer patients, carers and professionals in July 2018 at Central Coast Cancer Centre and in 2019 was part of the group called Central Coast Head and Neck Cancer Support who held a Soup for the Soul Event. And, each year the charity for whom I volunteer as an Ambassador, Head and Neck Cancer Australia, has awareness activities on line and encourages communities and individuals to host Soup for the Soul.

I was one who was going this with my friends at my local cafe but once lockdown came and they chose not to open as takeaway business was not a large amount of their trade, the event could not go ahead. So, I made it a virtual event and kind friends and professionals donated to a total of $305.

Some other memories and more from July 2021.

And August Arrived!

Of course we celebrated our daughter’s birthday. Post in detail here. We continued in lockdown which felt endless. I admit I did sometimes get very cranky on social media and then had to stop using it.

I tended then to spend more time outside, or doing something creative. I know preparing and sending off little packs of bookmarks was a positive experience.

Of course, Women of Courage continued on the blog but I was planning to bring it to a close soon. I stayed in contact on line with friends and family as much as practicable but also remembering people at work (even at home) are much busier than I am.

I had successful dental checks – of the regular kind. I am doing well after the surgeries I had in July and August 2021 and I am very grateful for that. I talk to Dad once a week. He is OK and finding the visitors restrictions within his unit complex quite frustrating. He is a sociable person. My brother and sister in law help him each week with shopping and some company. I haven’t been to see him since mid June because of “lockdown”.

I try to get out each day somewhere to notice nature – walking locally or driving somewhere near the water and that helps regulate my mood.

And to do this often:

 

What’s ahead and what other news is there?
No-one knows.

However, I know I am going well and have quite a few choices of art and creative ventures at home. B is making a new TV cabinet and has numerous small projects on the go. He is doing some on-line music lessons and I have similar ones for art. We would not be happy if the NBN stopped working!!

My dear husband has enjoyed writing his 3rd blog post, with another one to come. We are very well suited…different interests but shared common history, love of kids and education (not always the formal kind), and connecting with people. It’s the first time in our marriage of over 50 years that we have spent so much time together at home and for the most part…at least 99% …it’s going well.

Our next door neighbours have two little ones, one born just before Easter and when our family visits were curtailed and I had excess of mini cupcakes in the freezer, it’s been great to share (safely!) a couple of little boxes of treats. Their family cannot visit just as we cannot have ours come. Still, for the greater good.

We have made a promise, once new restrictions began for lockdown, to only go to two stand alone supermarkets, the doctors and chemist and (before they became more restricted in entry) Bunnings on occasions for B. On one day, only one of us goes out (for essential reasons) and we stick to that. I recently made a trip to the local Reject shop…the only place open in a large super centre to buy a stash of cards for upcoming birthdays and celebrations. I also got some fun items which have been sent to Sydney to two families for the school aged grandkids…a care package…costs more to post by express but I would rather they got them! Australia Post employees tell me they have never been busier.

Here’s  two days of contrast (weather and condition wise) at Soldiers Beach.

 

Mon 23.8.21. Warm weather

Great day but look at those clouds.

Windy & wet. Tues 24 August.

Same ‘area’ where person was snorkling on Monday!

 

 

UPDATE: In late August I heard very sad news. Two friends had both died of cancer. One of whom was a Woman of Courage. Her name is Tracey Fletcher King. Here is the link to her story:

The second person is Fergus McCulla, a young man I had the pleasure of meeting back in 2019 as he had questions to ask me about my surgeries for cancer in my mouth. Fergus’s cancer was a very nasty one, and despite “everything” he eventually left behind the pain and suffering, that as his Mum said, he never spoke about. On Tuesday, I will attend his funeral service which will be streamed on-line.

 

Sending my love to the  families and friends of both of these special people. Vale Tracey and Vale Fergus. I am honoured that our paths crossed.

 

 

 

 

And so the second of three parts of 2021 is done. I will of course, be finishing this year’s story. However, I am no longer going to update here as I have found it hard(er) than I imagined in the midst of other life stuff…meaning, I am reducing some of my ‘have to’s in 2022 and keeping Telling My Story going won’t be a blog post. I might do a summary one time, but the recall and record keeping is less appealing than when I committed to starting!

 

Thanks for reading. And maybe just skimming but looking at the pictures. That is cool too. I am grateful I have used this blog to make me accountable.

Last one will be published as the last blog post (and Link Up) for 2021. 51/51….but we have a few weeks to go to that, and I am not wishing the year away!

Denyse.

Link Up #255

Life This Week. Link Up #255

You can link up something old or new, just come on in.

* Please add just ONE post each week! NOT a link-up series of posts, thank you.

* Feel free to go with the prompt for the week to add your ‘take’ on the prompt. Or not.

* Please do stay to comment on my post as I always reply. It’s a kind connection I value as a blogger! 

* Check out what others are up to: Leave a comment on a few posts, because we all love our comments, right!

* Add a link back to this blog in your post somewhere, or on your sidebar or let others know somewhere you are linking up to this blog’s Life This Week.

*Posts deemed by me, the owner of the blog & the link-up, to be unsuitable for my audience will be deleted without notice. These may include promotions, advertorials, sales and any that are overly religious or political or in any way offensive in nature.

Next week’s optional prompt: 36/51 Self Care Stories #5. 6 Sept. Link Up #256

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Click here to enter


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