Monday 25th March 2019

It’s My Favourite. 11/51. #LifeThisWeek. 26/2019.

It’s My Favourite. 11/51. #LifeThisWeek. 26/2019.

Why I wrote “it’s MY favourite” as an optional prompt is a mystery. You see, I am the worst at selecting favourites.

I like and love a LOT…so how can I proceed?

By words and in pictures of course.

That IS MY FavouriteBLOG POST!

 

Routine

Getting out of the house every day, dressing with purpose IS my favourite routine along with the refreshing and reviving double shot, small latte somewhere before midday! One coffee a day.

Walk

I like walking more these days and try to get around 6,000 steps a day in. Some walks are slower than others. And that too is a good thing. A favourite walk on Manly Beach 11 years ago is here introducing my grandson to the sand and the water. Even further back in memory, is the 3 generations of us who “walked” as part of Bridge Climb well over 16 years ago.

Patterns.

I cannot go past nature for favourite patterns. These are but a few. Yes, they are close-ups and are part of the wonder that IS nature: colours and shapes we can barely replicate.

Celebration

I have been the one to make memories via celebrations, little photo books, parties, gatherings and more in our family. As we live away from the city this is much harder and the family is getting older and bigger. However, using the word celebration I believe I have found MANY favourites indeed!

 

Experience.

To have my ‘upper prosthesis’ added to my gums following cancer and then to smile (and eat again) was a BIG favourite. I also loved being part of this book “Women Kind” and in 2006 had the experience of a solo trip to the US where it was a favourite to visit Alcatraz.

Colour

Yes it’s the hue of blue. But I do love other colours too. However, it IS to blue I return to over and over.

Memory

I have been blessed as they say with a good memory and I did have many images to choose from for my favourites. Even these are but a few favourites!

 

Creation

I think the more my brain is not thinking work (job)  anymore it is allowing me to create. I love the ways in which I can be inspired but my favourites are almost always based on shapes – triangles being wonderful to design with and mandalas. In 2016 when I discovered how to design and colour mandalas my creative life was enriched.

So, do you find it hard to select favourites too?

Tell me more in the comments.

Denyse.

On Mondays I link here with Kell for Mummy Mondays.

You can link up something old or new, just come on in. * Please add just ONE post each week! * Feel free to go with the prompt for the week to add your ‘take’ on the prompt. Or not. * Please do stay to comment on my post as I always reply and it’s a bloggy thing to do! * Check out what others are up to by leaving a comment because we all love our comments, right! * Add a link back to this blog in your post somewhere. I don’t have a ‘button’ so a link in text is fine! *Posts deemed by me, the owner of the blog and the link-up, to be unsuitable for my audience will be deleted without notice. * THANK you for linking up today!

Next week’s optional prompt: 12/51 Memories I’d Like To Re-Capture 25/3/19

 

You are invited to the Inlinkz link party!

Click here to enter

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The Big C and Me. 15/2019.

The Big C and Me. 15/2019.

It’s time to share more about me and the Big C.

Yes, it’s about C for…..

CONFIDENCE!

(ha! not the other big C for cancer)

I think I give an outward show of being confident. It is not really a fake it till I make it confidence either.

It is about self-confidence in selected settings.

  • I am confident about my school life and teaching days and enjoy sharing the stories from then.
  • I love this part of me that can share now. I know there were days in education that were not always great (yes, my emotional health took a beating in 2002) but I have grown so much as a person and learner since then.

 

  • I am getting more confident of how I am managing my self-care in regards to less anxiety that plagued me for the years of my transition into retirement.
  • What good news that is! It was horrible for me with IBS thrown into the mix and I have done so well taking on board exposure therapy and a small medication routine.

 

  • I am less than confident in my belief about how well I am going in terms of my mental outlook since my cancer diagnosis and subsequent treatments and surgeries.
  • What is the evidence each day? None, really. It just happens sometimes.

 

  • I remain under-confident about my changed appearance a.k.a. my body’s change from very overweight to ‘almost normal weight’ and then back to a slightly ‘overweight’ status.
  • Am I taking steps to understand this huge shift and learning as I go? Yes. Every day.

 

  • I am still not as confident as I think I need to be to take on a continuing role in educating others about Head and Neck cancer because I am sensing judgment of others. I do know that I call upon courage to help me through even I have doubts.
  • Do I have evidence? Not really.

WHY?

I am who I am.

I am the product of a childhood and teen years spent in a dominant paternal household. I was told what to do. I may not always have done it but the memory of “other people’s words” being my measure for self remain.

I am able to give myself a ‘good talking to’ at times and can turn this matter of lack of self-confidence around.

But it takes energy and time AND motivation. I do not always have these on hand together and so there are days when my lack of self-confidence AND worth impact me more.

I am learning more in terms of self-compassion and how each of us is connected via shared humanity.

AM I FOOLING ANYONE?

Possibly but what of it?

  • I am on Instagram each day keeping myself accountable for dressing with purpose and going out somewhere for coffee.
  • This does help me ramp up some of my confidence in just doing so. I am not reliant on the comments as much any more because I know the effort I put in makes the outcome worth it.
  • But then when I have kind followers write comments of “congratulations, kindness and cheering me on” I do appreciate this a lot but also that inner critic rises up and adds her voice “would they say that if they really knew me?”
  • Lies. I do not tell them as far as I am aware but it seems maybe I am believing them from this inner critic. Who? Moi?

WHAT NOW?

Onward.

I know that putting these words here has helped me see that it’s my faulty thinking that has been affecting my self-confidence.

OK! How to change that?

  • Already I have in some ways as I now recognise this inner critic voice and her role.

 

  • My actions, my words and my inner life help me remember MUCH more about the confidence I like to have and know I can bring more to the fore.

 

  • Each time I dress and go out for coffee, I am embedding self-confidence.

 

  • My daily journal keeping can continue to be a ‘write it all down’ place and then review for evidence of this confidence tracking upwards not the downwards the inner critic can believe.

 

  • My on-line interactions with people from my various communities in education, blogging and head and neck cancer are ways in which I grow my self-confidence and also give back to others where I can and it is asked for.

 

  • Seeing myself as others do and may. It helps to believe that I am both good and doing good. This is something I have struggled with all of my life and want it to change. I can do this. I will remind myself more.

 

  • Maintaining practices of:

 

  • being in nature,
  • time-outs with my art journal,
  • chats with my husband, meditation each night,
  • helping my physical body to relax,
  • exercising within my limitations,
  • planning to eat well and doing the same without any deprivation,
  • cancer checks and better understanding of the fact that cancer actually never leaves but might take a back seat in my life,
  • taking time to make contact with family and friends,
  • exploring the local area’s beauty,
  • browsing at the shops,
  • reading,
  • keeping to a timetable of sorts each day for balance in my life.

Already I feel better!

Thanks for reading.

Do you have an issue with the Big C?

 

Denyse.

Joining with my blogging friends here:

Min on Tuesdays here for #ZenTipsTuesday

Sue & Leanne on Wednesdays  here for #MidlifeShareTheLove

Leanne & Crew on Thursdays  here for #LovinLife

 

 

 

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I Remember. 46/52. #LifeThisWeek 2018.117.

I Remember. 46/52. #LifeThisWeek 2018.117.

This post, originally written last week for Share Your Snaps was not sitting right for that prompt and then I saw this one.

I Remember.

 

I have noticed in the years past that I get tense, twitchy and tetchy in November. I used to think it was because I was tired and the end of the school year is nigh. I no longer have that reason. I now think and feel it is related to my birthday on the last day of November.

My birthday approaching brings a mixed bag of feelings:

  • sad (older)
  • contentment (glad to be here post cancer)
  • regret (not appreciating some of the people in my life more)
  • resentment (because some of those people, hello my parents, raised me in a way that I felt special BUT I perceived that was the case only if I was/am thin, achieving, managing financially)
  • anticipation of both negative and positive aspects of the day which celebrates me.

I know this might sound grouchy and somewhat mean-spirited but instead of pretending and pushing my November feelings and thoughts away, I have admitted them…and along with these pictures, may help heal me  for future Novembers.

November is:

  • my parents’ wedding anniversary
  • armistice day – this year 100 years since 11.11.1918
  • anniversary of my aunt’s early death
  • getting ready for Christmas
  • remembering my teaching/principal roles at this time of the year
  • my birthday

 

Do you have memories of any times which leave you somewhat like my birthday month does?
I am deliberately choosing to post about gratitude this November and so far these are the images.

Share your photos and your stories anytime here!

Denyse.

You can link up something old or new, just come on in. * Please add just ONE post each week! * Feel free to go with the prompt for the week to add your ‘take’ on the prompt. Or not. * Please do stay to comment on my post as I always reply and it’s a bloggy thing to do! * Check out what others are up to by leaving a comment because we all love our comments, right! * Add a link back to this blog in your post somewhere. I don’t have a ‘button’ so a link in text is fine! *Posts deemed by me, the owner of the blog and the link-up, to be unsuitable for my audience will be deleted without notice. * THANK you for linking up today!

Joining Alicia here for Open Slather and Kell here for Mummy Mondays.

Next Week’s Optional Prompt: 47/52. Best Cake I Have Eaten. 19/11/18.


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The A-L of Me. #LifeThisWeek. 19/52. 2018.39.

The A-L of Me. #LifeThisWeek. 19/52. 2018.39.

I’ve been doing a ‘clean-up’ of old posts. Some drafts from waaay back in 2011, 2012, 2013 and 2014 have been trashed. I do however keep some posts in draft form to give me an idea of what things were like for me when writing here back then. I came upon a 4 year old post called: The A-Z of Me. I read it and determined, that with some additions it could be copied and pasted for this prompt.

What I found interesting is how I have not really changed much at all. Some of the updated life circumstances have been added to what makes me Denyse now, but essentially I have remained pretty much the same.

I wonder about what others might say about themselves, so I am looking forward to seeing who blogs using the optional prompt this week for A-L and for the M-Z week.

Art-lover  I really love to make art, look at art and appreciate the ART of others.

Blogger who uses this space, and Facebook,  to connect, share and communicate her passions

Caring person about people I care for, those who struggle in life from time to time and about issues which are really meaningful for me. I add for Cancer too as once diagnosed, it is ‘part of me.’

Dramatic in my moods, from highs to lows at times but often “over” them much faster than most people. I’ve added Determined in 2018 too.

Excitable with a side of tension, yet more of joy mixed with happiness, and often like a little kid!

Fat is not a word I like, but I embrace that it has been a descriptor of my outward appearance for decades. Whilst I do not diet to change it, life’s health circumstances have changed as I am a different size to my first edition. Maybe, Fabulous? Ha!

Generous to a fault — and the fault may be that I am not generous enough of time or energy for me. Sadly I add Gums: for that is where my cancer was found.

Helpful is my “middle name” not Jennifer, but again, I can ‘over do’ this and it become UNhelpful to me. A balancing act needed here.

Intelligent and so grateful for this genetic gift as it has given me opportunities in life and career, and now in retirement years to continue to learn and enjoy sharing knowledge.

Jealousy is hard to admit but yes, I am jealous. Of some opportunities I’ve missed & others have had, of having ‘enough’ money just to name a few. I am not proud to admit this one, and I am also ‘better’ at dealing with the ‘green eyed monster’ than I was. I am more prone to joy these days too.

Knowledgeable of trivia, such as my BFF birthday even though I haven’t seen her for 45 years, and of all sorts of news and family details. Oh yes, am often a walking encyclopedia of ‘stuff’.

Left-handed and proud even though the world we inhabit is made for the right-handers, it also sets me as a little bit different and for a usual-conformist in nature, this makes me ‘special’.

Interesting shots I have found from around the time of writing this original words and to now, adding just some.

I am very interested to read your A-L of Me if you completed the prompt.

Thanks for joining in or commenting.

This space here is always appreciative of readers, linking bloggers and comments!

Denyse.

Linking up with my friend Alicia here for Open Slather too.

You can link up something old or new, just come on in. * Please add just ONE post each week! * Feel free to go with the prompt for the week to add your ‘take’ on the prompt. Or not. * Please do stay to comment on my post as I always reply and it’s a bloggy thing to do! * Check out what others are up to by leaving a comment because we all love our comments, right! * Add a link back to this blog in your post somewhere. I don’t have a ‘button’ so a link in text is fine! *Posts deemed by me, the owner of the blog and the link-up, to be unsuitable for my audience will be deleted without notice. * THANK you for linking up today!

Next Week’s Optional Prompt: 20/52. SHARE YOUR SNAPS 4. 14/5/18. Unbelievable…it’s 5 weeks since the last one!

Life This Week 19/52. The A-L of Me.


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Taking Stock 1. 9/52. #LifeThisWeek. 2018.19.

Taking Stock 1. 9/52. #LifeThisWeek. 2018.19.

This week, and every 9th week for 2018, has the optional prompt: Taking Stock. Giving credit where it is due to Pip Lincoln here.

I had a quick look to see back how many of these posts I have done in recent years and it comes to six. I am not looking at previous content until I finish. And even then I may not. Life moves on for us doesn’t it? So, on a Saturday afternoon in late Summer in February 2018 here is my Taking Stock.

Making:  great progress in my recovery from cancer surgeries x 3 over 8 months.

Cooking: chocolate cupcakes this week for my husband’s 69th birthday on Tuesday. Side note: this means his last b’day in the 60s. OH.

Drinking: a cup of coffee made by a barista in one of the coffee shops I visit in the area. Sometimes it’s a piccolo latte, other times a latte with double shot. Got to have my hit!

Reading: the Sydney Morning Herald every day. I even had a letter published recently. Go me.

Wanting: not much other than for me and my husband to remain as healthy as we can* see note about about birthdays!!

Looking: at rental houses which have ducted air as our lease is week by week from now but we still have till August to move out.

Playing: a four dots connecting game on the Ipad thanks to a bloggy friend’s recommendation.

Wasting: not much these days at all. Time nor real items.

Sewing: hah! You joke with this prompt! Oh maybe I could praise the excellent needlework of the surgeons for #surgery 3.

Wishing: that I had found the courage to explore more about what the white spot in the gum was even though it was tested and found to be candida in 2015. But hindsight, it is a wonderful thing.

Enjoying: time with my husband as we have both settled into a gentle routine of retirement and it is most pleasant.

Waiting: for a few weeks to pass and then I will be back at Westmead Oral Health for a temporary prosthesis (teeth) in my top gums.

Liking: warm weather but an overnight shower or two is always welcomed.

Wondering: who will be brave enough to finally end the Gun Lobby in U.S.A.

Loving: the updates on Instgram by my friends with little kids. It reminds me so much of the fun we had with our grandchildren back then.

Hoping: a blogging friend going through a serious medical/surgical procedure soon for her Crohns Disease comes through with flying colours.

Marvelling: still…at how the surgeons made my upper mouth from my leg.

Needing: maybe some cooler weather clothes when I am off my #febfast of spending on clothing.

Smelling: aroma of frangipani as soon as I open to back verandah door.

Wearing: a different outfit Every.Single.Day for Outfit of the Day pics on Instagram and loving the challenge of it. Now been going for over 120 days without a repeated outfit.

Following: I’m A Celebrity Get Me Out of Here…via IQ so I can fast forward the messy eating bits but I do like the people (except David Oldfield)

Noticing: that I have a steady mood almost every day and that if I go a bit down, I can pull myself back up with no problem.

Knowing: that it is normal for people to have a range of emotions and I am not alone.

Thinking: that maybe Barnaby Joyce could be a lonely man and father to 5 because the current partner will eventually leave him – based on various media reports about the why they got together.

Feeling: very fortunate to be in the best surgical hands for head and neck cancer with my team led by Professor Jonathan Clark.

Bookmarking: some facebook quotes and articles

Opening: my mouth a lot to…talk, eat, drink and to show the doctors and dentists!

Giggling: at some of the random videos which pop up on facebook. It can be quite the rabbit hole!

Feeling: content.

Do you take stock regularly?

Thanks for reading this blog and commenting too. It’s the comments that make a community!

Denyse.

Joining with Alicia on Mondays for her link up Open Slather.

Life This Week 9/52.

You can link up something old or new, just come on in. * Please add just ONE post each week! * Feel free to go with the prompt for the week to add your ‘take’ on the prompt. Or not. * Please do stay to comment on my post as I always reply and it’s a bloggy thing to do! * Check out what others are up to by leaving a comment because we all love our comments, right! * Add a link back to this blog in your post somewhere. I don’t have a ‘button’ so a link in text is fine! *Posts deemed by me, the owner of the blog and the link-up, to be unsuitable for my audience will be deleted without notice. * THANK you for linking up today!

Next Week is the optional prompt’: 10/52.  “SHARE YOUR SNAPS” 5/3/18.


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Can’t Live Without. #LifeThisWeek. 28/52. 2017.92.

Can’t Live Without. #LifeThisWeek. 28/52. 2017.92.

Welcome back everyone to Life This Week!

I have missed you all. Thank you to those lovely bloggers who checked on how I was going when I was in hospital and since I have been home.

I can’t live without blogging and bloggers it seems too!

I’ve listed the revised prompts and their weeks here. They are also on the Home Page.

This post will be ‘short and photo-filled’ as a side-effect of the strong anti-biotics that my gut dislikes (and I do too!) is giving me less time to write….if you know what I mean…so without further ado here is just a few of what I can’t live without.

This man! Met on 17 Oct 1970 and can’t live without his love, care, commonsense and the yin to my yang. Love at first sight it is true (for us) the opposites attract.

 

B put my wedding ring on this finger on 23 Jan 1971 and recently re-sized down after weight loss, I was sad when after surgery and my hand swelled it became stuck. Some cream on my other hand helped shift it and when B came for next visit it went home in his wallet for safe keeping.

 

Nature and its colours, shapes and beauty. I see it everywhere and can’t live without in my life.

 

Art of some kind is always part of my creative life. I am a highly visual person and enjoy creating my own mandalas now. They are meditative for me. I took art materials to hospital and by the time I was out of ICU in my room I was ready to create. Not this one! This was done at home.

 

Photography. I have a phone or camera with me wherever I go. I cannot live without being able to capture something which may never appear again. I particularly enjoy living close to nature like this because it gives me so much joy to find scenes like these to remember. In fact, I showed some of the nurses these photos and they could not believe the beauty that abounds where we live now.

 

I know I cannot live without my iPhone for sure! This is me the day we set off for Sydney for pre-admission to hospital and I guess I knew it would be my ‘last toothy smile’ for a while. The other thing in that photo I cannot live without is my glasses! Readers and multis. Cannot see any details without them.

 

The beach. Wherever it is. I cannot live without seeing spaces of water and sand. I am missing them now as I am a bit house-bound but on our way home from Sydney I loved coming across the Hawkesbury River towards our ‘now home’ the Central Coast.

 

I also cannot live without capturing a sunrise or a sunset if I get the chance. I did each morning from my hospital room. It was so uplifting to be part of nature this way. And my ‘old home town’ of Sydney is here.. I do not miss her as much as I thought I did.

 

I cannot live without my car….well I do for now because my husband drives me where we need to go. Last week I ‘had’ to stand next to her (red car I love you!) after my visit to the GP. He, by the way, is friendly and amazing so I share cannot live without him. He has helped me so much in the short time he has been our GP. I will add him to the list!

 

Blue Sky. As we all know we cannot live without what is above us as it sustains us. I cannot live without the air, the clouds which bring rain and the blue sky which gives joy.

I hope you’ve enjoyed this literal ‘snapshot’ of what I cannot live without.

Denyse.

Thank you for linking up here.  I link up on Mondays too with Alicia here for Open Slather and Kell here for Mummy Mondays.

You can link up something old or new, just come on in. * Please add just ONE post each week! * Feel free to go with the prompt for the week to add your ‘take’ on the prompt. Or not. * Please do stay to comment on my post as I always reply and it’s a bloggy thing to do! * Check out what others are up to by leaving a comment because we all love our comments, right! * Add a link back to this blog in your post somewhere. I don’t have a ‘button’ so a link in text is fine! *Posts deemed by me, the owner of the blog and the link-up, to be unsuitable for my audience will be deleted without notice. * THANK you for linking up today! Next Week: Winter


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