Saturday 20th April 2019

My Biggest Fear. 21/52. #LifeThisWeek. 2018.43.

My Biggest Fear. 21/52. #LifeThisWeek. 2018.43.

It took me a while to decided WHAT it was that was my biggest fear.

I ran through a list in my head.

I talked to my husband about it too.

I decided that it was not having enough money:

then I remembered I wrote a post called: What is Enough? I recalled that ‘what is enough money’ is different things to different people and that in actual fact we most likely DID have enough …as long as I reined in my clothes’ shopping. OK.

Of course, health came next…and I talked about the fear of becoming very ill. Say, with cancer. Oh yes, I have cancer. I am going OK with that too. So not that. Mmmmm.

I decided that I could not fear homelessness, nor being abandoned by my husband and I could, at this stage, not fear getting too old I cannot do things for myself.

What, then do I fear most?

Not being in control.

Simple, right?

Not really.

We humans like to think we are IN control. But are we?

So, what I know now, as I always have but was not prepared to admit it.

I can only control me.

  • My actions.
  • My responses.
  • My decisions.

Of course, as I need to get  along with others, I must remember that not everyone has this insight.

I found this link and quote from the source. What an applicable read it was!

Courage requires practising this golden mean between being too afraid and not afraid enough.

For it is only through such practice that you can acquire a habit of moderating your fear, which is exactly what being courage is.  There is no algorithm for calculating this golden mean but there is rational judgment grounded in evidence.
So to overcome you fear of losing control, you can,

  • push yourself to act on the evidence, without demanding certainty, or in spite of your fear of the uncertainty;
  • make a habit of this-not always and perfectly, but for the most part;
  • resign yourself to live by probabilities, not by guarantees.
  • accept yourself as an imperfect being who is inherently subject to making mistakes about the future; and
  • stop worrying and ruminating now, not later.

These things really are in your control!

Look how the journey led me to here as I blogged!

I am doing a mindfulness practice with Tara Brach and Jack Kornfield each day now, as well as my Headspace meditation with Andy Puddicombe each night.

Add in my art time, some time outside in nature and I am s l o w l y learning about acceptance and taking things ONE at a time.

So, what is your biggest fear?

Oh. Of course DEATH is one. Enough said. Seriously I am trying to be light-hearted in this post …

But if you or another person is feeling sad, depressed and could possibly be suicidal, please give them the Lifeline Number here or ring it as you need to. 13 11 14.  

Thank you for sharing.

Denyse.

Joining with Alicia here for Open Slather.

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Next Week’s Optional Prompt: 22/52. How Did Your Blog Start? 28/5/18. 


 

 

 

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