An experienced teacher who is a blogger, and a member of this community, offered this post. It was exactly right for NOW. Getting your children ready for back to school, or school for the first time. This is a two-part post. The next is published on 20 January 2012. Why not subscribe so you don’t miss anything.
Part One.
On one of the last days of school last year I was observing my prep (also known as Kindergarten) students having their lunch.
At almost exactly the same time two things happened: a Year 2 boy accidently bumped the sandwich out of the hands of Mr A while a bit further away another prep bumped into Miss B.
The Year 2 boy very kindly bent down and picked up Mr As sandwich, tried to put it back together again and gave it back with a sheepish “sorry”.
Mr A shrugged and went off to eat. No big deal.
Over in Miss Bs corner however a small dark thunder cloud had formed. The bump had happened to her you see. And she was deeply wounded. Nothing had happened, it was just a careless bump as an excited friend ran past, but to Miss B is was something worth making a point about.
“Hey! You bumped me” she indignantly cried out.
“Sorry” came the distant shouted reply. But quite frankly the other prep didn’t really care. After a year of listening to Miss B whinge and whine about every little thing, who could blame her.
And this brought me to a conclusion about Miss B that I had been thinking about all year.
Her parents love her and want her to be happy. Definitely. But she really has spent the majority of the year being unhappy. Everything is always too hard, too big, too slow or just plain wrong. She’s not always first. She can’t always choose her partner. She can’t always have the job she wants. She has to be part of the class not the centre of it. And it is not a criticism of her, or her parents, it’s just an observation.
I feel sorry for Miss B. In her parent’s attempt to keep her happy; to see to all her needs, to help her out at every turn and to make sure that she doesn’t have to do it if she doesn’t want to, they have actually set her up for a very miserable life. That little pout comes out at least by 5 minutes into the first lesson of the day.
“But I don’t waaaaaant to…”
“It’s too haaaaaard…”
“I’m tiiiiiiired…”
“Can’t you do it for me?”
My first impressions of her were not great.
My technique if I’m having trouble bonding with a student (or even liking a student) is to watch them interacting with their parents.
This always helps me to see the loveable features in that child. And her parents are perfectly nice people. They don’t overly indulge her, they just don’t appear to be approaching things the right way for Miss B. And as a consequence I rarely see Miss B smile – unless she’s getting her own way.
This is a two-part post made deliberately so for some consideration for readers to determine how they may be preparing their children for school (for the first time or back to school). The second part will be published next Friday (20 January 2012) on the same day as Denyse Whelan. The Newsletter.
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Am hoping part 2 provides some pointers on how parents might avoid this scenario! Time is running out!! Perhaps the damage is already done!! Hoping Miss Mads adapts more readily than poor Miss B. I’m pretty sure she will! (All fingers & toes are crossed!)
It does! I think your two girls are so different that miss Kinder 2012 will be fine. Miss B is a beautiful soul & I hope she’s ok too
Your preparation has been right but resilience is a tough ask for some children no matter what.
A confident mum & dad are a great help too! Xxx