Thursday 14th November 2019

Women Of Courage Series. #24. Grace Titioka.110/2019.

Women Of Courage Series. #24. Grace Titioka. 110/2019.

A series of blog posts on Denyse Whelan Blogs to be found here from mid May 2019: Wednesdays: each week.

Here is the introduction to the series.

Courage is strength in the face of pain or grief. It’s doing something that frightens you. We face situations that demand courage every day. These situations provide us with choices, and the way we respond to those choices determines our future. Dayne Shuda.

I am so pleased to introduce Grace Titioka who is 47. We first met in 2011 as members of the early Australian blogging community and hit it off. Grace also helped me through some blog changes and social media when I was first starting to ‘get myself’ more media and on-line ready. Grace and I may not see each other as much now I have moved from Sydney but we connect on-line. Grace has a pretty powerful life story and she touches on aspects of it here. Here’s to G from D. With Love and Gratitude. 

 

What have you faced in your life where you have had to be courageous?

I don’t think there’s been one particular life event where I was consciously being courageous.

People have said that setting up a life in Japan completely on my own for almost a decade was a brave act. Others tell me that having a high risk twin pregnancy would’ve surely seen me at my most courageous.

But to be honest, I don’t think there’s been one particular life event where I was consciously being courageous. In fact, lately I’ve discovered that it’s our vulnerabilities and the ability to openly express them- as raw and real as possible, no matter how uncomfortable or undignified it makes us feel, that’s where courage truly shines.

 

How did this change you in any way? Please outline further if this has been the case.

Maybe growing up as a migrant child, there was always a shield, protecting myself and my family from racism and being treated unfairly by Australian society. This led to anger and frustration, even causing me to leave Australia but it never truly resolved my issues. Only allowed me to run away from them.

Over time, especially since being married to a patient, caring husband,  I’ve learned that a tough exterior can only hurt the ones who love you unconditionally and truly help you.

He always says, he’d rather see me at my most vulnerable instead of just being grumpy and silent.

And when we’ve had a disagreement, there’s always two words he’s more than happy to hear from the stubborn me: “I’m sorry”

 

Is there something you learned from this that you could recommend to help others who need courage?

To have courage is to believe in yourself and surrounding yourself with those you can trust implicitly.  We all have very different sides to our complex characters – some traits we’re proud of, others not so much. But if we work to claiming all these components and seeing them for what they with a non-judgmental, gentle approach, we can find comfort, contentment and our own version of courage.

 

Do you think you are able to be more courageous now if the life situation calls for it? Why is that?

I like to think so but we never know what curve ball life throws at us. I just know now that I will allow myself to feel all those raw feelings, observe them but not let them define me. A situation is only as bad as how we react to it.

 

Is there any message you would give to others facing a situation where courage could be needed?

Be gentle with yourself. Being courageous doesn’t mean you have to deal with life with heavy force and resistance. More often than not, courage is the exact opposite.

 

I like the way you did explore some of the aspects of your life where you have been and continue to be courageous. Thank you for sharing and for being a caring friend, especially through my early days as a cancer patient. Always nice to know who is there for me.
Denyse.

Joining each Wednesday with Sue and Leanne here for Mid Life Share the Love Linky.

On Thursdays I link here for Lovin Life with Leanne and friends and on Fridays, it’s Open Slather here with Alicia.

Copyright © 2019 denysewhelan.com.au – All rights reserved.

 

 

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Comments

  1. U love this, “To have courage is to believe in yourself and surrounding yourself with those you can trust implicitly. We all have very different sides to our complex characters – some traits we’re proud of, others not so much. But if we work to claiming all these components and seeing them for what they with a non-judgmental, gentle approach, we can find comfort, contentment and our own version of courage.” There are many ways to be courageous and we each have to decide what theat means for us.

  2. Hi, Denyse and Grace – Thank you for this addition to the Woman of Courage series. Like Michelle, I was struck by the words “to have courage is to believe in yourself and surround yourself with those you can trust implicitly.” Imagine the positive changes that would take place in our world if we all adhered to these words of wisdom!
    #MLSTL

    • It’s been a little while coming but since the change I’ve made in who I surround myself with, it’s made a huge impact to my own courage. There’s nothing like a gentle nudge or encouragement from someone close who only wants best for you.

      • I hear you on that dear G.

        Thank you for your words too Donna.

        Lovely to read these stories of Women of Courage. Let me know if you would like to be part of this too!

        Denyse x

  3. Leanne | www.crestingthehill.com.au says:

    Hi Grace – lovely to meet you and could I just say that I feel so sad for people like yourself who have been impacted by racism – your beauty shines through from your writing and your picture, and to have ever doubted that is such a shame. I’m glad you found a husband who encouraged you to rise above it all and choose joy. I also appreciate your use of the word ‘vulnerablity’ when it comes courage because that’s something I think we all grow from – opening ourselves up and being authentic.
    Denyse, thanks for linking this post up with us at MLSTL and I’ve shared on my SM 🙂

  4. Hi Leanne, thank you for reading my post! I still struggle with my vulnerabilities – that’s thanks to years of keeping that shield up and people out! But I am getting better and letting that guard down. And wow, the courage it takes to do that – still overwhelms me!

  5. This was a very insightful post by Grace and this sentence resonated with me the most ‘it’s our vulnerabilities and the ability to openly express them- as raw and real as possible, no matter how uncomfortable or undignified it makes us feel, that’s where courage truly shines.’ Such a great story of courage in so many ways. Thanks Denyse for sharing Grace with us. I love our blogging connections 🙂 #mlstl

  6. How lovely to see Grace here Denyse! I’ve been blogging for seven (7) years now and met Grace back in 2012 via the Flog Yo Blog Friday linky she used to host. I miss you in the bloggy world Grace but thank goodness for social media so I can keep up a little with what you’re up to and watch your gorgeous boys grow up. As you know, I’m a Mum of twin boys (grown up now) too so we have that in common. You have always been very insightful and smart and I particularly love your closing point … “Be gentle with yourself. Being courageous doesn’t mean you have to deal with life with heavy force and resistance. More often than not, courage is the exact opposite.” Such a treat to see you here in the bloggy space Grace. Much love to you! xoxo #TeamLovinLife

    • I am so glad you got to share your connections with Grace as well as the twin boys one! Yes Min, “those were the days of Aussie blogging” weren’t they? I am so glad I did (and continue) make those connections from 2010 onwards.

      Denyse x

    • Min!!! How are you??? Thanks so much for reading my post – especially after all these years! Yes, I do remember how our twins connected us in a big way back when I was more active at blogging.
      You have truly inspired me to get back into blogging!! I do truly miss the connections xxx

  7. Hi Denyse, Thank you for introducing Grace to us.

    Nice to meet you, Grace. You have an amazing smile, which already tells me you have joy and something positive to share. I love what you say about sharing our vulnerabilities truly makes us shine. Sometimes this is more difficult said than done. Great advice on surrounding ourselves with people we trust. Thank you for sharing your wisdom:) Erica

    • My pleasure Erica.

      It’s a privilege that these women are prepared to share their stories with us all.

      Thank you.

      Denyse x

    • Hi Erica,

      Thanks for reading my message and your lovely comment. I do hear you about how difficult it is to share vulnerabilities – I’m still trying to master that one every day! Ask my husband!
      Have a wonderful Monday. Sending light and love to you!

      Love,
      Grace x

  8. Hello Grace and Denyse!

    So many take away’s from this post – thank you Grace. Creating a life on your own in another country sounds like an enormous courageous exercise to me. I can only imagine the roller coaster of emotions during your high risk pregnancy. I think you’re remarkable.

    Thanks for sharing with us.

    Sandra 🙂

    • Hi Sandra,

      Thanks for reading my post! I can remember our struggles and difficulties those early years still very clearly but I tell you what – it made my family closer and so much more resilient.
      As for my twin pregnancy – not sure if I have fully recovered from that emotional roller coaster but I do look at them every day in awe and count my two biggest blessings.

      Have a fabulous Monday!
      Sending light and love,
      Grace x

  9. That she is…courageous and adventurous is Grace!

    Thank you Sandra.

    Denyse x

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