Friday 18th October 2019

Women Of Courage Series. #19. Jan Wild. 98/2019.

Women Of Courage Series. #19. Jan Wild. 98/2019.

A series of blog posts on Denyse Whelan Blogs to be found here from mid May 2019: Wednesdays: each week.

Here is the introduction to the series.

Courage is strength in the face of pain or grief. It’s doing something that frightens you. We face situations that demand courage every day. These situations provide us with choices, and the way we respond to those choices determines our future. Dayne Shuda

Today I welcome Jan to the series. Jan and I connected via blogging and, I admit, to us both being in our retirement years. Jan at 65 is an amazing role model to many, including me, in her ‘get up and go’ attitude to what life brings. Jan is currently on a wonderful holiday overseas and is staying in touch via social media. I hope the vacation is going splendidly!  

 

 

 What have you faced in your life where you have had to be courageous?

As Denyse says we tend to downplay our own courage and I admit that in answering this question I didn’t feel very entitled to the description of courageous. So I had a look at some definitions and liked this one for courage; “strength in the face of pain or grief”.

I realised then that I had been courageous in my life on more than one occasion. No not big saving someone’s life courage, more personal decisions related to my own life.

The thing that comes most to mind is leaving my job and taking 12 months time out to improve my health. This was due to my having suffered two grand mal epileptic fits. I don’t know about courage, I felt I had no choice than to address my health as my top priority. But of course it was courageous as I was not in a relationship where I could depend on someone else bringing in income and I needed to sell a property and dip into my savings to fund my living expenses for the year.

 

How did this change you in any way? Please outline further if this has been the case.

Making that decision really did cause me to rest on my own resources and my resilience. I moved to Hawks Nest in NSW and ate simple healthy food, walked on the beach, swam in warm weather and spent plenty of time resting. I also took up hand painting ceramics, something I had not done previously, it was a great creative outlet.

 

Is there something you learned from this that you could recommend to help others who need courage?

I learned that taking a risk doesn’t have to be a disaster. Health wise there really was no choice, financially it was challenging. But I took the time to readjust my expectations and indeed my expenditure. I would shop to a tight budget and there would only be a treat if there was money left over. There were no new clothes or overseas trips but I knew my health was improving (and I have not had any further fits).

I learned to really enjoy my own company and to move in accordance with my own rhythm of life. I recommend anyone who can to try that for themselves (and I know it isn’t always possible).

 

Do you think you are able to be more courageous now if the life situation calls for it? Why is that?

I’m not sure that it has made me more courageous, on reflection I have made several decisions which others may consider courageous. But I have no desire to do any extreme sports and I am very cautious in many parts of my life so I think my answer is no. Although I do know that I am resilient and able to cope well in many situations (not all though).

 

Is there any message you would give to others facing a situation where courage could be needed?

Yes, if possible, consider the alternatives, do your homework and make a well-considered and well-planned  decision. Ask yourself  ‘What is the worst thing that could happen?” For me (other than deteriorating health), that was running out of money, and I realised that in the worst case scenario I could land on a family member or take a less taxing job than the one I had left (or both of those things).

 

I like reading the ways in which “we” can find ourselves going down the ‘worst case scenario’ route may not even happen. I so need to remember this too!

Thank you Jan.

Denyse.

 

 

Blog/Website: https://www.retiringnotshy.com.au

Twitter: @RetiringNotShy

Facebook Page : https://www.facebook.com/retiringnotshy/

Instagram: retiring_not_shy

 

Joining  with Sue and Leanne each Wednesday  here for Mid Life Share the Love Linky.

On Thursdays I link here for Lovin Life with Leanne and friends and on Fridays, it’s Open Slather here with Alicia.

Copyright © 2019 denysewhelan.com.au – All rights reserved.

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Comments

  1. Jan I would say you are definitely a woman of courage Jan. I enjoyed reading about the decisions you made and you’re coping strategies at what must have been a very difficult time. Another great guest post Denise #MLSTL #shared

    • Thank you Jennifer, life truly is a learning journey isn’t it. And for me it is interesting to now look back at that time, and to feel that I would again make the same decision.

    • Thanks so much Jennifer. This series helps us know more the lives of others and how they have overcome their various challenges. Do let me know if you would like to be part of it.

      Denyse x

  2. Thanks Denyse for hosting another wise woman of courage. I’m sad to hear that you had health problems Jan but so glad that you were positive in the way you dealt with them, despite the fears you had around change and not working. I love how you’ve moved forward in the blogging world too. I also think that all us bloggers of retirement age are brave and courageous to still be learning new things, keeping up with technology and essentially having the guts to still be playing in a much younger arena! I hope you are having a wonderful holiday overseas! #MLSTL and Shared on SM

    • Thanks Jo, it is good to be past that time of my life, but there was a lot of learning at that time, and I guess that continues to strengthen my resolve. I never think of blogging as particularly courageous but I do (mostly) enjoy the challenges.
      We are now in beautiful Bruges for 8 days and looking forward to slowing down a little.

    • That’s my pleasure and privilege Jo. I love seeing the stories outlined myself and how each commenter often something different in each of them.

      Denyse. x

  3. I love your advice Jan about considering the alternatives, doing your homework and making well-planned and well-considered decisions. Looking deep into the bowels of what that actually looks like and how it will play out is indeed a very courageous undertaking. I hope your good health continues and there is much more travelling to be done.

    Sandra 🙂

    • Thanks Sandra. Going down the worst case scenario analysis was a real turning point for me and I guess where I learned the importance of having a plan B. And yes it does take courage to make big life changes.

    • Yes, Sandra, Jan’s story teaches us much about practicality and getting on with what we have to rather than what we might wish to.

      Thank you for your regular commenting on these posts, you have such generous words to share.

      Denyse x

  4. Hi Jan – nice to see you here being featured on Denyse’s series. I think leaving a job to take care of yourself is something a lot of us can face at some time during our life (having just done exactly that!) but doing it without a partner’s support is even braver. I’m sure it was the best thing you could have done for yourself and would have prevented a lot of long term problems down the track.
    Denyse, thanks for linking up with us at MLSTL and I’ve shared on my SM 🙂

    • Thanks Leanne. It was a big decision and I definitely needed to think through the options and ramifications, but in a sense the path I took was really the only sensible choice. And yes, you are correct, the only sustainable option.

  5. Jan, it is easy to put our heads in the sand and say nothing is wrong. What’s hard is changing lifetime habits and getting out of our comfort zone. I do believe what life deals to us are nothing that we can’t handle. Sometimes there seems no good reason why things happen other than they occurred to make us who we are.

    Kia Kaha and enjoy your travels.

    Thanks, Denyse for highlighting another strong positive woman. #MSTL

    • Thanks Suzanne, what a lovely comment. I was certainly challenged to step outside my comfort zone but it was a valuable life lesson for me, and definitely gave me greater self belief.

      • Thank you so much too Suzanne for your kind words.

        Let me know if you too would like to share your story as the series is continuing into 2020.

        Denyse x

  6. I think leaving your job for any reason is a very courageous thing to do – it’s removing the safety net to start again. But more often than not it is the right thing to do at the time.

  7. Jan is certainly a fabulous role model and deliberately choosing (for whatever reason) to remove a structure such as a job is super courageous.

  8. That is most definitely a story of courage Jan. I’m so glad you did it and that you got your health improved in the process. Stunning photograph of you too. Thanks Denyse for featuring Jan here as part of the series. I always find her so inspiring. xo #TeamLovinLife

    • Thanks Min. I guess that was the time that I truly learned that if you don’t have your health you don’t have anything. From time to time I have to remind myself of that.

  9. Hi Denyse and Jan, I enjoyed reading more about your life decisions and how they have impacted on your life. Thanks for another great read. Sharing for #mlstl

  10. Denyse, thank you so much for sharing my story. You are a gem .

    • Thank you for sharing. I have to say, each person’s story is so personal and different that to share it is also to be courageous. As the year ends and the next one starts I will be waiting until February 2020 to resume the stories. I have been so fortunate to have so many agree to my proposal to share.

      You have been a most diligent commenter and I thank you so much. Now, back to that lovely holiday!!

      Denyse x

  11. Hi, Denyse – Thank you for featuring Jan here. I also greatly admire her get-up and go spirit!

    Hi, Jan – You have given us several gems here, all helping to build an attitude of courage. I especially like, ” taking a risk doesn’t have to be a disaster.” Enjoy your travels!

Denyse values & reads every comment written, thank you. There is always a reply.

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