Tuesday 22nd May 2018

My Week 7 Intention. Take a Break. 2017.24.

My Week 7 Intention. Take a Break. 2017.24.

I have had a bit of a  rough week because I am trying too hard.

Yes, this is something that I do not realise until it’s almost too late.

It’s been a rough week on the health front with a nasty IBS flare. I can never really explain the why of IBS for me but I do get upset when the what of IBS impacts my life. The episodes meant I could not travel even to a needed appointment. It gets me down.

As a result of that, I try to fix things. I try too hard because that is who I am and I need to slow myself down and be more gentle and kindly towards myself.

I do not ’cause’ the IBS but I still have to live with its consequences and its effects on my confidence and demeanour.

I can add the HEATWAVE has affected me too as I dread the onset of extreme weather and as a worrier I think ‘what would we do if the power went off?’

So, I am giving myself a week off…from learning to manage my health symptoms and effects to….taking a more relaxed approach to life in retirement as it is for me!

My Intention for Week 7 is to give myself a break and take one! To do less learning and stop trying hard. To enjoy more moments that are about becoming absorbed in something creative or just being.

The way the past week was did not help my Week 6 intention of react less and respond more because my inner tension levels were higher. So, that’s OK too. I know what I need to do…and that is LESS..this week coming up!

How are you going?

Do you sometime try too hard and not realise until later?

Tell me more!


UPDATED as of Thursday 16 February. Since publishing this on Sunday some things have changed for the better…I have been listening to an amazing program about ‘helping your nervous illness’ (as she named anxiety back in the 1960s) by Dr Claire Weekes. I cannot explain without a whole blog post but I can tell you her messages are exactly what I needed to hear and understand. 


Joining Leanne’s lovin life linky here each Thursday. Thanks to her lovely team too I am really enjoying your comments!



  1. Sorry to hear you’re having a bit of hard time Denyse, IBS is no fun at all. Take care of yourself xx

    • Thank you lovely Sarah. No it is not ‘fun’ because it stops me from doing what I want/need to do on some occasions as last week shows. I also know I need to get a better outlook about it..and oh so slowly learn to be less reactive when it decides to show up! Have had a better day today and am feeling quite positive too. Trust things are going well for you… D xx

  2. Oh I hope you are feeling better soon Denyse. I know what you mean about trying so hard that it all becomes too much. I’ve been experiencing it lately with my blogging and just not having fun anymore. Taking a break seems easy but sometimes it is not that easy to do. I try to cut down on social media but it is so hard not to sneak a peak. We are heading to the Coast for the weekend so hopefully a break will do me good. Enjoy your break and take care.

    • I know EXACTLY what you mean. When I was first blogging (and again in 2016) I was ‘trying too hard’. I really thought that what I had to do was be across all media all of the time to be ‘seen’. Now I blog for my sake and having conversations with people JUST like YOU. I turned the social media/blog thing into what worked for me. I sometimes get over the top enthused again (only a few weeks back) and add more to my on-line presence, then I realise it feels like pressure and that is NOT what I want at this time of my life. I HAD that as part of my life for 45 years. Have you asked yourself the ‘why’ of your blogging lately? Have a wonderful break and some fresh perspectives will emerge I am sure. Thank you for your well-wishes and support. Denyse x

  3. Oh Denyse I’m sorry to hear you haven’t been well. Yes I do know what you mean about trying to hard and not realising till later. Unfortunately I tried too hard for a long time and didn’t realise till it was too late and I had crashed and burned. I still have a habit of getting obsessed with something and running myself into the ground trying to get it perfect. I hope you feel better soon and I’m very glad you are giving yourself a break. Take care! xo #TeamLovinLife

    • Interesting isn’t it? I have days of feeling well but if I was completely honest, they seem to end with some kind of stressors impacting. I accept now that this is my nature and I can allow it to occur. I am also much more forgiving of myself than I used to be. I would have to say, offering self-compassion and kindness is more helpful that beating oneself up (yet again!) Thanks Min!!

  4. My IBS symptoms have returned ten fold this past fortnight. I suspect it is just the area of my body my auto immune condition is targeting this time but I also know I haven’t been following the leaky gut diet to the letter.

    If I need to leave the house, I basically don’t eat. It is so debilitating and I’m back not feeling confident enough to sign up for things outside the house and canceling last minute things I have signed on for. So I’m revisiting the leaky gut diet this week and a new doctor. Hoping things improve quickly.

    • Oh my goodness. I sure can understand how horrid that must be. I am able to ‘stop’ a severe episode with 2 immodium (as approved by my Dr) but I am reticent to take it unless I absolutely have to because a specialist ages ago pointed out that ingesting too many (I did that once as a preventative) might have been the cause for a bout of pancreatitis.
      I walk the tightrope and so far so good. But, I am doing so much more in terms of mental acceptance etc and do not have the ‘food or eating’ issues thank goodness.
      I “have” learned though a while back that I eat small portions and can no longer have coffee and cake (I used to go out a lot for that in Sydney) nor meals out. Hence my social life is nil. But for me, its price I pay. Just would like to be able to go to Sydney again with confidence. Other things I am doing with my thinking etc and challenging myself are helpful. I know my anxiety and stress levels need to be better understood by me and I need to be kinder to myself when things go awry.
      I can only send you healing and helpful vibes that things ‘settle’…somewhat. D x

      • I suffer from pancreatitis, not sure if that’s why some medications for this side of things isn’t available to me. I’m on so many meds as it is just to function. Keen not to add any more into the mix.

        • I know it must be very hard. My old Gastro specialist was full-on conservative and frightened me about taking immodium. However, he has retired and the guy who replaced him said ‘it would be fine’ to treat symptoms. That is what my GP agrees with. I still would prefer not to have any at all…and of course IBS. Currently doing some learning about ‘accepting’ the various aspects of it along with anxiety related to it. Slow progress but better than the feelings of panic which I used to experience. I understand you have a MUCH more complex set of health difficulties. Take care.

  5. Yes I think as women we never stop beating ourselves up over every single issue. I try very hard on all fronts only to exhaust myself at times. I do occasionally have to give myself a break and prioritise things a bit better in my life, otherwise I would be a head case. Sorry to hear about your health issue. Mine issue is a sore back which is driving me crazy. 🙂 #TeamLovinLife

    • So let’s make a pact! No more of this from now. I am far less inclined to do it as I realised it overemphasised my stressors. Interesting isnt it? The brain and the body do work together so we need to feed them both well. I am sorry to hear about your sore back. I use heat pads..not great in hot weather of course..but they give me some comfort. I hope you recover soon.

  6. Take it easy and take care of yourself Denyse. Our health is so important 🙂 xox #TeamLovinLife

    • I am getting better at this Lyndall and using my time more for noticing nature and art and less about pressure from whatever ‘internal critic’ is saying!

  7. Oh yes I can very much relate Denyse as it’s similar to my biggest problem of getting stressed over stuff I don’t NEED to do. I take on things, tell myself to do them and they aren’t what I want to be doing but what I think I SHOULD be doing. So it feels like a burden, I find myself rebelling against it, feeling guilty and then getting stressed.

    I think taking a step back when you need to is all-important. And take care won’t you! xx


    • So true …when you hear your voice say ‘should’ replace it with ‘could’. It’s something I have learned to do more. If WE cannot give ourselves permission then who can? Too much rigidity in my life and career (along with my status as first child!) makes me prone to the shoulds. Let’s do this Deb! Down with shoulds!!

  8. Have a nice break Denyse. We all need to treat ourselves to a break. I tend to give myself a day each week where I can just NOT. Not do lists, not put pressure on myself, not allow myself to be pressured by others, not have to be anywhere, not have to do stuff. Just NOT.

    • I so hope you do Leanne because when I see what you are getting up to on SM I get to thinking “oh my, that’s a LOT” but you know this too obviously and so making plans for NO plans is great!

  9. We still love you Denyse, take it easy and look after you!