Thursday 23rd February 2017

My Week 8 Intention. Perspective. 2017.28.

My Week 8 Intention. Perspective. 2017.28.

I’ve mostly been a details person..small picture…even though I can imagine a big picture I need to know details and more.

Now, as I have found in life, THIS is not always possible.

Who knew?

Ok, we all know but sometimes it is hard to let go of welded on beliefs of shoulds and musts.

Here’s where perspective will be more to the front than behind as I work (and play) with my intention for this week.

I want to continue to work with details because I find that comforting and helpful but I also want to keep in mind the bigger picture too.

From this:

 

To this:

My Week 8  intention is to broaden my view, keep matters in perspective and look at the whole picture wherever possible.

Update: last week’s intention of taking a break worked for me in some respects although learner-me who wants to ‘get better’ from her IBS and anxiety continues to seek new information and practise meditation and more. It was good to give myself permission to ‘take a break’ and the supportive comments from many helped!

What’s your intention this week?

Are you a big picture or details person?

Denyse.

Linking here with Sue from Sizzling at 60.

On Thursdays I link here with Leanne for Lovin Life.

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Wonderful Water Views. 2017.27.

Wonderful Water Views. 2017.27.

I know in Australia we have had too much of HEAT, DROUGHT and FLOODING…and FIRES…and it has been incredibly stressful for so many.

http://www.vidiani.com/maps/maps_of_australia_and_oceania/

It certainly was for us in some ways as there was a threat of power outages and we NEEDED to run the Air Conditioning as the outside temperatures went to well over 40 degrees celsius (over 105degrees F) That is wayyyy hot. We survived. Phew.

So, just a few days later…it has cooled down to around 30 degrees C in the day and that’s awesome! I went for a drive on Wednesday just to be in nature once more.

In the morning I went along the road which follows The Wyong River.

In the afternoon I visited my favourite walking beach, Lakes Beach.

The weather was warm (yay), gentle breezes abounded and the sea was calm.

One little video was made on the banks of the Wyong River at high tide.

I walked and recorded the next two little videos at Lakes Beach Budgewoi at low tide.

 

How is the weather where you are right now?

Denyse.

Joining photography friends here:

Trish: Jen: Steph: Sue

On the weekend I link here with Sammie for the Ultimate Rabbit Hole.

 

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My Week 6 Intention. React Less Respond More. 2017.20.

My Week 6 Intention. React Less Respond More. 2017.20.

credit: https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/0b/75/1e/0b751e663829b6a2b95fa9e144b06085.jpg

I have always been a react first…and sometimes (OK, maybe a lot) an over-reactor who almost always regrets her behaviour.

Oh why oh why?

I think I know why…really..it’s about unexpressed words or views and how I need to get in first..maybe it’s about needing to think I have ‘control’ but then again..that’s not an excuse is it? Here’s an interesting take on the two!

credit: http://d3fhkv6xpescls.cloudfront.net/blog/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/react-vs-respond.jpg

However, I do know that I regret my reactions almost EVERY.SINGLE.TIME.

I would rather take TIME to consider my response rather than react as I know the other person will feel valued and I will feel satisfied that I have not placed my frustrations or blame on another.

My Intention for Week 6 is to slow down my reaction to any given situation so that I take a breath, have a think of how I will behave, and make a response. I will also forgive myself for forgetting this and get back up and remember again!

Update: Intention Week 5. Listening actively has become an almost -automatic response (see what I did there!) and it really has changed me from within and in my dealings with others. 

So what is your style?

Reactor? Responder? Bit of both?

Tell me more!

Denyse.

Joining Leanne on Thursdays for Lovin Life Linky here.

P.S. This is from one of my favourite on-line teachers ever…Tara Brach. She has written two books I love and has a regular podcast too. Pop over to tarabrach.com to find out more.

If you have the time…this is awesome! Thanks Tara.

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My Week 5 Intention. Listen Actively. 2017.16.

My Week 5 Intention. Listen Actively. 2017.16.

I have been delighted with my success in carrying out my intention to #savourthepositive. I used Instagram to spread my message and it was a good reminder each day to continue with encouragement and support from my followers! Thank you!

thought I was good at listening but like many, I listen with an ear (and brain!) that is formulating a response or an opinion.

I have noticed that when I listen actively  speakers are both engaged and valued and it is demonstrated in their body language.

The person I listen to most and need to be more actively listening to is my husband.

In the past, I have been butting in, arguing the point and all those things I know chatty and bossy people like me can be.

What I now know is how much my relationship is changed for the better when I listen actively.

This is my Week 5 Intention.

http://3childrenandit.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/05/listen-pic.jpg

I will actively listen in conversations with my husband each time we chat. I will also actively listen when I am out and about locally and speaking to people on the phone.

For those who are interested in the work and research about relationships from the Gottman Institute here is more about Active Listening. Dr Gottman and his wife have interesting and consistent research about whether a relationship in trouble may be saved or not….and no surprises, having respect and regard for the other is one. This is exemplified in active listening!

Denyse.

Joining in with Leanne and the Lovin Life crew each Thursday here.

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My Week 4 Intention. Savour The Positive Pt 1. 2017.12.

My Week 4 Intention. Savour The Positive Pt 1. 2017.12.

Last week I know I benefitted from my intention of kindness and it was brought home to me even more after a stressful time on Tuesday. I had to summon up the courage to drive a long way (45 minutes) on a super hot day to the periodontist who I HAD to see about my poor gums. I did it, but it was at a physical and emotional cost the next day when my IBS struck and I couldn’t go out. But, instead of my ‘old ways’ of talking to myself and thinking I had ‘failed’ I was able to be kindly towards myself in word and action and be a friend to myself!

Being a friend to yourself takes practice!

It was also lovingly helpful to have so many commenters who understood what I was writing about when they read my post last week. Thank you all! This kindness that is spreading around is GOOD!

Building upon this, and wanting to continue to learn more about how our thinking can distort our feelings (and vice versa) I have become a firm fan of the work of Rick Hanson PhD & his collaborator  Richard Mendius MD. He speaks from years of research about the ‘neurons which fire together wire together’ and how we CAN affect our health by too much of the negative messages,  self-talk and so on.

I have been listening to him speak with  Richard Mendius about  and in doing so, am beginning to make some subtle but helpful changes to my daily experiences.

My Intention Week 4/52. 

My intention this week is to ensure I am taking time to SAVOUR positive experiences of all kinds including these:

knowing I am loved and have a person who is my best friend to talk to, hug and be companion to every single day

that the world of nature just outside my house in the form of my small garden offers me opportunities to observe, smell and touch to let the memories flood my brain

I know this needs to be on-going so next week will be an update and more about what I have learned via the lessons and meditations from this CD program.

Have a good week everyone.

Denyse.

I join Leanne and friends here for the Lovin Life Linky on Thursdays.

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My Week 3 Intention. Compassion. 2017.8.

Week 3 Intention. Compassion. 2017.8.

I am continuing my inward journey this week of intention by learning more about compassion. I have much to learn and firstly about myself. I guess I am tough on myself as many of us are. In fact, both my GP and Psychologist have told me that very thing. I am hearing the words of a very wise man, my husband who says “I expect too much of myself”. What I am doing…and learning…is ‘how to be more compassionate to myself’ as I begin the slow journey of being slightly more confident about how to accept Irritable Bowel Syndrome as it is now because the anxiety it brings can overwhelm me.

Here are some excerpts from an article I read yesterday. The link to the full article is at the end of this.

Compassion is the feeling that naturally arises when you learn of the suffering of another, and that motivates you to want to do something to help. Far from being just a social nicety, compassion has a great evolutionary purpose: Human offspring are the most dependent and vulnerable of any species, and need the most care from others to survive. This total dependence is why Charles Darwin said that sympathy is humanity’s strongest instinct. Simply put: Without compassion we wouldn’t survive.

If you find yourself feeling less moved than you’d like—or maybe your empathy muscle has grown a bit weak from lack of use—here are some ways to strengthen it. You, and every other living creature, will benefit from the results.

Be Kind to Yourself

Sometimes it’s easier to feel compassionate for another than for yourself. But true compassion doesn’t discriminate. The next time you’re having a difficult moment, see if you can offer yourself some kindness. You might be surprised at how much it helps—and helps you to feel kinder toward others.

Turn Values Into Verbs

When asked what they value most in the world, people will often say things like “peace,” “compassion,” or “connection.” But in order to make this real we have to turn these values into verbs, making them more specific and practical. If you value compassion, what does that look like daily? Take out a piece of paper, write “Compassion” at the top and create a list of actions, small to big, that you can start doing immediately.

This is how we live Gandhi’s words: “Be the change that you wish to see in the world.”

This is the source of the full article by Elisha Goldstein.

My intention for Week 3 of 2017.

“dipping my toes” in the water – making small changes!

Each time I take the smallest steps in gaining some greater confidence about living with IBS I will give myself words of support and ensure I write down how it went for me as my psychologist and I planned.

Are you compassionate towards yourself?

Tell me more!

Denyse.

 

Joining Leanne’s linky called Lovin’ Life here this Thursday!

 

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My Week 2 Intention. Be Kind. 2017.4.

My Week 2 Intention. 2017.4.

Last week I wrote about intention here. I have had a more challenging week than I would have liked so I admit it has been difficult to even decide to blog for the second week about it.

Here goes.

At least I am blogging the truth!

I did notice nature more in the past week. In fact, I went into nature, particularly our little back garden, to both de-fuse and become more grounded.

Having anxiety from time to time (more like all the time lately) coupled with its hanger-on IBS has not a good week made!

This week. Be Kind To Myself.

The intention  is to be  KIND to myself in thoughts, and deeds and to consider myself (and the various things that are going wrong for me) OK. That sounds easy but it can be hard when you (I) are a task master/mistress who has exacting standards. So, instead of berating myself for not feeling emotionally strong or having an episode of IBS I will be KIND(er) than I have been.

Tomorrow’s post, for Life This Week, is My Word for 2017 reveals a very similar word for me.

Are you someone who finds it easy or hard to be kind towards yourself?

Denyse.

 

 

 

 

 

Linking up with Leanne here for Lovin Life on Thursdays!

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Welcoming 2017 With Intention. 2017.1.

Welcoming 2017 With Intention. 2017.1.

Happy New Year readers!

Thank you for visiting Denyse Whelan Blogs, and I hope you stick around for the year ahead.

This year I will be blogging about my usual topics of education and schooling, life this week, mindfulness, creative pursuits and photography.

I have added some depth to my thinking and doing for 2017 by deciding to post weekly about my intention(s).

In meditation we are asked to consider the intention of the process. I see more intentionality around me as I begin to delve into my mandala creations and those I find elsewhere.

So, today whilst it is not my word for 2017 (that will be announced on….intention is my goal for how I manage myself and the week ahead.

I will blog each week about that intention, set out here, and come back to write more about how the week went!

intend to do this each Sunday and will see how I fare!

Sunday 1 January 2017.

Intention.

This week I make it my intention to be out in the beauty that is nature and to notice it using the senses and to be mindful and appreciative of what nature brings to me and others.

Inspired by these photos today to make my intention.

 

Do you have something in nature that inspires you?

Are you someone who is setting some New Year’s intentions?

Will you be considering a ‘word’ for 2017?

Do comment and let me know what you are up to!

Looking forward to reading what you have to say!

Denyse.

 

Joining the lovely Leanne here for her Thursday link up called Lovin Life! Happy 2017 everyone at Lovin’ Life!

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