Tuesday 23rd April 2019

Easter Means This. 16/51 #LifeThisWeek. 41/2019.

Easter Means This. 16/51 #LifeThisWeek. 41/2019.

Easter means nothing religious to me these days.

Although I was brought up to eat fish on Good Friday and Easter Eggs left by the Bunny were only consumed on Easter Sunday.

Oh, yes and Hot Cross Buns for Good Friday breakfast.

Protestant upbringing, in the 1950s-1060s.

Some traditions die hard and I “still” make my Dad and daughter what was Mum’s speciality: the Fish Dish. Haddock in a curry-flavoured white sauce.

As parents we enjoyed the fun of leaving an Easter Bunny (Elegant Rabbit from K Mart I recall)  and eggs around the house. Sometimes there’d be a dozen hidden and an empty egg box with clues left for the child to find the egg. I know we had fun making up the clues and seeing the results the next day.

As grandparents we might have an Easter Egg hunt and in what was to be our last Easter celebrating in Sydney with all the grandkids there, this was amazing fun! Much laughter and guesses when Papa would ask the grandkids questions so they could choose their prizes. Don’t ask me the details, it was five years ago!

 

EGGStravagant Easter Egg Hunt for the final time in Sydney: for all the grandkids.

 

My less-EGGstravagent Eggs for Grandkids in 2017.

I love the Royal Easter Show in Sydney and have done since I was a kid and it was held at the old Showgrounds – now the Entertainment Quarter I think. It was good when the show came to Homebush for travelling as we could catch the bus in and entry was included. I often took the grandkids and this was my last time, in 2014. I loved whatever was happening in the main arena – time for a snack and a sit down too. This time it was motor cross and motor bikes on show. I also loved getting to the Woodchopping arena. Fantastic to see the country coming to the city.

Royal Easter Show: Sydney. Last visit for me: 2014. Loved the Show!

At the Show: with a motorbike fan grandson next to me.

Nostalgia is playing a part in this post! Bear with me. Back in my Infants teaching days and as an Assistant Principal in the 1980s an Easter Hat Parade was mandatory. Well, encouraged by the community and we teachers did have some fun too. Whilst the kiddies paraded in their home-made hats and bonnets, the “Easter Bunny” aka the parent committee, visited empty classrooms and left an egg for all the children. Much excitement!

At one school, we used this song, on video here, over and over as the parade progressed. Nothing about paying copyright and fees back then either. I cannot hear this (and I like it) without remembering: melting chocolate coming off hats where the eggs were part of the decoration….and how much trouble some parents went to in making Easter hats. It was never a competition at schools back then. Thank goodness.

This video is from the US and the Northern Hemisphere is into Spring and all that brings for Easter. Enjoy if nostalgia is your thing too!

maskedman46Published on 29 Mar 2013

Never saw you look quite so pretty before

Never saw you dress quite so handsome

What’s more?

I could hardly wait to keep our date

This lovely Easter morning

And my heart beat fast as I came through the door

For…

In your Easter bonnet with all the frills upon it

You’ll be the grandest fella’ in the Easter parade

I’ll be all in clover and when they look us over

We’ll be the proudest couple in the Easter parade.

On the avenue, Fifth Avenue, the photographers will snap us

And you’ll find that you’re in the rotogravure

Oh, I could write a sonnet about your Easter bonnet

And of the guy, I’m taking to the Easter parade.

On the avenue, Fifth Avenue, the photographers will snap us

And you’ll find that you’re in the rotogravure

Judy Garland…Fred Astaire…Ann Miller in Easter Parade Musical 1948

 

Hope your Easter holidays are/were safe, happy and eggs-cellent!
Denyse.

Linking here on Mondays with Kell for Mummy Mondays.

You can link up something old or new, just come on in. * Please add just ONE post each week! * Feel free to go with the prompt for the week to add your ‘take’ on the prompt. Or not. * Please do stay to comment on my post as I always reply and it’s a bloggy thing to do! * Check out what others are up to by leaving a comment because we all love our comments, right! * Add a link back to this blog in your post somewhere. I don’t have a ‘button’ so a link in text is fine! *Posts deemed by me, the owner of the blog and the link-up, to be unsuitable for my audience will be deleted without notice. * THANK you for linking up today!

Next week’s optional prompt: 17/51 One Third of 2019 Is Over! 29/4/19

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Newcastle Writers Festival. 40/2019.

Newcastle Writers Festival. 40/2019.

When I lived in Sydney I went to a few Sydney Writers Festivals when they were still located at The Wharves down by the Harbour. It was often on a warm May Saturday I attended and soaked up sunshine, wisps of words from those who chatted along with their companions and took my seat in the theatre or section to listen to authors. I saw quite a few and even got some selfies back then as well.

Now, I live closer to Newcastle than Sydney so it made sense to consider attending the ‘Newy’ festival and even better when I saw who I could book a seat to listen to and ‘get a selfie’ with.

On Sunday 7th April it was a beautifully warm day in Newcastle and I took the chance to learn more about the city as I found the parking situation better this time.

I met my friend first. She had already had a coffee so that would wait for me. We hadn’t seen each other for years and had quite a bit to catch up on. Lisa is one of the ‘old school bloggers’ I first met in 2011!

 

Session One.

Rick Morton. OK. He too is someone I have known since 2011 (the first Bloggers’ Conference) and I have followed his career as a journo and writer since. In fact, he interviewed me for a story in the Australian about “Grandparents Caring for Grandkids”. That was in 2014. Now, he has written a best-seller.

His story.

Wow. The tales he tells are true. His talk sure was impactful. His book is One Hundred Years of Dirt. It has been re-printed over and over. Now I can listen to him narrate his story on Audible. Thanks Rick for our extra long chat and connecting me to your Mum Deb. Do read Rick’s book!

Intermission.

There were no sessions I wanted to attend until after lunch. So, this meant I got time to meet this man, Trent Dalton. The author who, on Instagram, convinced me to continue listening to Boy Swallows Universe when I found it a bit unsavoury. He said: “Denyse, stick with it, it IS a love story, I promise you will love it.”.

He was right. It is. I did. I had to tell him! I lined up, not with a book to sign (it was at home) but to introduce myself. He was chuffed to meet me and so self-effacing. A lovely man. Please, if you have not, read or listen to Boy Swallows Universe.

Then Lisa and I caught up again over: lunch for her, morning tea for me.

Session Two.

After Lisa left, I walked around the Civic area and park trying to stay cool as the day’s temperature rose to over 30. Once I had a bit of a rest under a 100 year old tree, I made my way back to the Main Civic Hall where my friend Jane Caro was interviewed about Accidental Feminists. Her latest book. I took notes. I learned a lot about myself (because I am a bit older than Jane) via her life experiences. Interesting alright! Do buy or borrow the book.

Jane was so kind in between sessions when she agreed to a quick photo telling me “You look amazing”. Jane is a FB friend and knew about the oral cancer.

Summing Up.

It was a big day out for me. A first really since way before cancer but it was so good for  me to do this. I loved it and will certainly be going in 2020 if some of my fave authors are part of the program.

Do you go to Writers festivals?

Denyse.

Joining with Sue and Leanne here for Wednesday’s Midlife Share The Love linky,

With Leanne on Thursday for Lovin Life link up here

AND with Alicia on Fridays for Open Slather here.

Thank you all for your link ups.

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Share Your Snaps 3. 15/51. #LifeThisWeek. 38/2019.

Share Your Snaps 3. 15/51. #LifeThisWeek. 38/2019.

Manly: New South Wales. Australia.

When we moved to live in Sydney in 1959, we were pleased, in retrospect, that Mum and Dad chose to live on the Northern Beaches where Manly was the nearest beach, shopping centre, and starting place for the Manly Ferry to take us to the city. However, this “is” meant to be a sharing the snaps post, so here are many of mine….and I hope you enjoy the selection.

The family home. Not looking like this any more

Manly lies on the land of the Guringai people, the traditional owners of the land. It was given its name by Captain Arthur Phillip in 1788 when he travelled north of Botany Bay after finding it ‘unsuitable for settlement’.

He initially named the area to the north of the harbor Manly Cove after spotting a group of Aborigines in the area, about who he stated, “their confidence and manly behaviour made me give the name of Manly Cove to this place”.

The men he encountered were from the Kay-ye-my clan – of the Guringai people. As he scouted for fresh water in the area, Phillip met members of this clan and, following a misunderstanding, he was speared in the shoulder. He ordered his men not to retaliate preventing further bloodshed.

People gradually began settling in the Manly area around 1820 and by the 1850s Henry Gilbert Smith, the founder and developer of Manly, had the vision of Manly as a seaside resort.

https://www.coveredsummer.com.au/history-of-manly

This information is of interest in terms of Manly’s place in the white settlement of Australia. Always remembering the Aboriginal people who own this land.

Some smaller versions of these pavilions remain at the South Steyne end of Manly Beach.

 

One of the ferries on its way back from Manly

There was a ditty a long time ago, “7 miles from Sydney and 100 1000 miles from Care” or words to that effect, about a ferry trip to Manly!

Manly itself is a suburb of Sydney and the beach’s long stretch is made up of South Steyne – southern end and on the walkway to Shelly Beach and Fairy Bower, North Steyne is in the middle (where I used to go as a teen) and Queenscliff is at the northern end and where a certain ex Australian prime minister appears in his budgie smugglers far too often for my liking!!

Recently I re-visited Manly itself after being to see my 95 year old Dad in his unit at Dee Why. When I went the next time to Dad’s I showed him the photos and he lingered over them. He told me “in retirement, any morning I was not at golf, I’d come down here. Walk in the surf and the sand from South Steyne to Queenscliff and back. Some days it would be around to Fairy Bower”. I know he would always finish with a coffee!

I will always have a place for Manly in my heart. I now know, of course, how fortunate I was to live near here aged 10 to 20. We had access to it all as day visitors and holiday makers staying at my parents’ house as did our children. Many great memories of Manly.

 

Have you been to Manly?

I loved sharing these snaps here this week.

Denyse.

Linking here on Mondays with Kell for Mummy Mondays.

You can link up something old or new, just come on in. * Please add just ONE post each week! * Feel free to go with the prompt for the week to add your ‘take’ on the prompt. Or not. * Please do stay to comment on my post as I always reply and it’s a bloggy thing to do! * Check out what others are up to by leaving a comment because we all love our comments, right! * Add a link back to this blog in your post somewhere. I don’t have a ‘button’ so a link in text is fine! *Posts deemed by me, the owner of the blog and the link-up, to be unsuitable for my audience will be deleted without notice. * THANK you for linking up today!

Next week’s optional prompt: 16/51 Easter Time Means This. 22/4/19.

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Two Years Ago: Before My Cancer Was Diagnosed. Pt 3. 35/2019.

Two Years Ago: Before My Cancer Was Diagnosed. Pt 3. 35/2019.

Thanks to readers who have commented on these posts.

They are, in some ways, very personal and maybe a bit indulgent but they are going a long way for me to feel better and recovering well from my version of head and neck cancer, found in my upper gums and under one lip.

The first two posts about the two years ago can be found here and here.

My last words on the previous post were these:

“take the teeth and bridge out, I HAVE to know what is underneath!”. I was a bit better-mannered than that with my request to my dentist but inside I felt these words more!

Why Did I Want The Teeth Taken Out?

For well over 6 months from late 2016 into 2017  this dentist and I worked on “what could be going on with my gums”.

This is why.

  • My upper gums were sore and red. They felt that way in part of my upper palate (roof of my mouth).
  • There was a ‘feeling’ of skin tearing up behind the covered part of the gums as I had a bridge permanently in my mouth.
  • The bridge (and a crown) had been added to the 6 front teeth spaces to add to my appearance and function as the original teeth had been heavily filled and already had been treated to the maximum by the dentist in Castle Hill in 2010-2011.
  • I went along with this procedure without question as I was promised it would be better. It was paid for by Medicare for people like me with chronic dental issues back then.
  • I admit I was ignorant of the what and how of the procedure but it seemed to be right. I trusted the dentist.
  • What did happen over and over from then until April 2017 is each new and subsequent dentist (3 in total)  told me “You are not cleaning behind the bridge properly”.
  • I did what I could. It was a very awkward and uneven space and even the dentists were challenged with their instruments.
  • “You have candida” I was often told. Yes, OK. I took so many fungalin tablets and added nilstat as a mouthwash only to find no change, and diarrheoa as a side affect. NOT something I welcomed with IBS already the ‘beast within’.

The mouth still hurt.

I had thorough cleaning at the dentist as late as March 2017.

The mouth still hurt.

I watched the gums slowly creep over the top of the front teeth.

The mouth hurt more.

But still this dentist wanted to investigate more even though he said theoretically he could take the teeth and bridge out.

I went through trying to get myself tested for nickel sensitivity – nickel is part of the bridge. I chose not to. I wanted action.

I could not eat much at all – combination of the very sore mouth and anxiety about it and good ole IBS.

So, the deal was struck. My teeth and the bridge they were on were coming out of my mouth on 6 April.

But wait….

I am too scared to both travel AND to do this! Right?

From my journal the day before:

On Wed 5 April I was nervous about the upcoming dentist trip

I did go out & do things but the “enormity” of what was ahead overwhelmed me

I broke down & just couldn’t see how I could deal with it

B was good at listening but I knew that despite the dread & worry & fear IF I didn’t go through with it it would be :

Avoiding

  • Would make it worse
  • I’d not get my mouth fixed

So I took steps to make sure I got there:

1. 1/4 Valium in arvo & then at night helped reduce the internal rumblings

2. I told myself it was a positive to be getting it done as it’s troubled me for so long I couldn’t let it go on & on

3. I needed to tell myself the outcome & process had to happen. I stopped thinking there was doubt or other choices. I needed to own this

4. I ate small because I was scared of IBS but that’s not new.

5. I knew I could take immodium if there was a reason

6. I used the hypnosis from audible in a big way

7. I had B taking me & he agreed to do it anything to make it work.

The day came. It was just after lunch. Not that I ate any! Yes, my dear husband did drive me and yes, I took medication as advised. I was warmly greeted by the team who really understood this was hard for me. I had my iphone and  earbuds and a hypnosis session ready. It started with LOTS of needles and reassurance all the way. I could give a signal to stop (I did only need that to tell them it was still hurting too much). I could also ask for a break to go to the loo. I did that once. By the time I decided I had enough…it was done. I was surprised. My husband had sat in the room reading as I was treated and it was nice to know he was there.

I knew there would be a denture put in – and whilst that did not hurt then  it did later. I had the model made the week before. So, then I was shown the teeth and bridge. I took a photo but not the teeth with me. The dentist’s opinion at the time was that everything looked OK gum and bone wise and I would see him the following week. I just needed to get back in the car and home. It was done! Over.

Afterwards I recorded this:

 Mouth sore & swollen

 Ice packs on my mouth

Taking medication – neurofen & anti-biotic

 Still got some bleeding (6 hours later)

Headache & tired

 Ate squashed pear, yoghurt & grated cheese & PButter

Very proud of myself and was told by B I was great.

Now if only IBS would bugger off!

Back to dentist next week to check it out & adjust the partial denture.

It

Is

Over.

Then I had about a week of pretty intense pain manipulating the partial denture in and out of the top gums. The gums were sore. I just expected that I guess. The following week, I re-visited the dentist alone with more self-confidence albeit in pain, where he adjusted the denture, told me what to look out for and I would see him in around 4-5 weeks.

And so, within that period of waiting, things did not progress as well as either of us hoped.

There will be a fourth part to this lead up to the Two Years Since My Cancer Diagnosis.

I hope that sharing my story is somewhat helpful to you. However, I must add, as my Head and Neck Surgeon told me:

“Denyse your cancer is rare and you getting it with no risk factors (smoking, drinking) is even rarer”

With Prof Clark – My Head and Neck Surgeon at Chris O’Brien Lifehouse.

Thanks for being part of the journey in these posts I am writing…for good reason and for information shared as I so often need to do since my Head and Neck cancer diagnosis.

Denyse.

Joining with Sue and Leanne here for Wednesday’s Midlife Share The Love linky,

With Leanne on Thursday for Lovin Life link up here AND with Alicia on Fridays for Open Slather here.

Thank you all for your link ups.

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Two Years Ago: Before My Cancer Was Diagnosed. Pt 2. 31/2019.

Two Years Ago: Before My Cancer Was Diagnosed. Pt 2. 31/2019.

For anyone affected by a life-changing diagnosis that comes after some time of illness or maybe there is no sign, time becomes a part of memories of ‘back then’.

In writing here on my blog, I know I am helping myself as I continue to process my thoughts, actions and concerns relating to my eventual and pretty shocking diagnosis is a rare cancer in my mouth. For those who would like to read about this in the series of posts here is the link to the page called Denyse – Head & Neck Cancer.

It was recently that trawling through on-line journals I realised how much I had gone through along the way so I wrote the first post in this series is here. 

This post takes a different theme which was relevant to why and how I was feeling and acting in those months from December 2016 into May 2017.

March 2017.

It must be just me. I don’t know how to settle well into my life now it’s over 2 years since we left Sydney and are making a retirement life for us. How come “I” cannot settle. What is WRONG with me? My husband is doing it with ease. In fact, he is already volunteering in two community organisations, is planning to continue his tertiary studies. Me? I face each morning with trepidation. I find it hard to get up. To what, I ask. I go through the motions of making it look like I am OK. But I cannot fool myself nor my husband. It’s me, I just do NOT know what is wrong with me…..I know my GP says I am somewhat anxious but it’s for a reason which related to stress about my IBS. She tries me on some anti-depressant meds briefly but they affect my gut. I see my psychologist who again tells me, “you need to continue exposure therapy.” I am losing weight because I am too scared to eat because of IBS.

This look on my face here is me gaunt and showing the fear within even with my then-smile. Underneath those teeth was …..no-one knew.

What Did I Do?

More of what seemed to help me. At least it passed the time. It did not ease the knot in my gut for long but I was focussing on self-help. I must have listened to 100s of hours from many. These are people whose words I continue to value and have all of their CDs still. I listen to few now, but back then I thought they were helpful for my mind to slow a little. I used to listen in a semi-meditative way or as I was making some mandalas or patterns. I found these people’s words matched a lot of what I was hearing from my husband and my psychologist too.

My blog was a great spot for me to gather my thoughts and be interested in others. I was so pleased that I HAD made my blogging a priority. Mind you, there were days when I was not interested in connecting on line…but I did and continue to do so in the overall goal of remaining connected.

I probably did not let on to many other than my poor husband just how bad I was feeling on some occasions. I felt bad about feeling bad! I wondered if there was any chance I could feel ‘like I hoped’. My former GP who I continued to see in tandem with my current one for the next 2 months, was kindly but even she seemed to run out of reasons why I continued to feel so anxious.

The age old question: Was I anxious because of the likelihood of IBS or was the likelihood of IBS making me anxious?

I tried SO hard to make my inner life a better experience! I did art of one kind or another most days, I ventured out on short drives when I felt well enough, I cooked a little bit but I was so anxious about people visiting I could not enjoy the company of family nor was there any way I would drive to Sydney to see anyone. Nope. Not on.

Here are some of the many sayings that I hoped to absorb and integrate into my life. These were posted on Instagram. That account was hacked in May so I no longer have the IG versions, just my photos.

And all this time, my mouth hurt.

  • The skin behind the upper gums where the bridge was continued to be inflamed.
  • No the extra cleaning done in early March (see first post) had not changed anything.
  • The skin was growing over the top of the front teeth.
  • This matter concerned me greatly. I know I told my husband often enough.
  • But, as no-one in the dental or medical field had deemed this to be of any great consequence, I continued on.

Sadly, in pain emotionally and physically.

I hope that this post is helpful in understanding that my internal dilemma was a huge influence as I thought “I made all of this happen“. It would appear, that I may have been thinking about cancer far longer than even I realised. It IS true.

Next time: I could not bear it any longer….. “take the teeth and bridge out, I HAVE to know what is underneath!”.

Denyse.

Joining in these link ups:

MidLife Share the Love: Here on Wednesdays

Lovin’ Life: Here on Thursdays

Open Slather: Here on Fridays.

Do visit these link ups and join in the reading and commenting. We ALL need each other here in the land of blogging and comments are our “GOLD”.

 

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Calm and Balm For My Soul. 27/2019.

Calm and Balm For My Soul. 27/2019.

A gentle post of photos and how I help myself achieve more peace and calm in moments that are not always wonderful.

Some of those moments for me are pre-surgeries, recovering from surgeries at home, distracting myself from being hungry when eating was hard, calming my mind during a procedure or treatment by listening to music or an audio book, reducing my anxious mind’s whirling whilst being driven by my husband….not about him, about me, and not being in control!

I know many people have tried some if not all of these, but here’s my offering!

Getting Outside. Even Into the Backyard!

Making Something Creative.

Having These On Hand & On the iPhone Playlist.

These are some of the major ways in which I help myself achieve a greater level of calm. It is not easy. I am learning all the time. I also use the Calm app program each night. I highly recommend trying Calm and then signing up. I got a lifetime offer last year which has paid for itself over and over. Not only is there meditation but there are master classes in many fields such as cravings. There are adult ‘sleep stories’ which are a delight to listen to and hopefully nod off under the covers. I recommend these but no-one pays me to do so.

This link takes you to Calm and there is a sign-up for free sessions. See how you like it!

There is no sponsorship on my blog. I only want to share what I find works for me. Then if I tell you about it, and you like it too, that is a win!

What are your ideas for calm and balm for your soul?

Denyse.

Joining here with Min and friends for Zen Tips Tuesday. Thanks for the link up!

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Grateful For These Women. #IWD2019. 25/2019.

Grateful For These Women. #IWD2019. 25/2019.

It happened last Friday: 8 March 2019.

International Women’s Day.

I have always known about green and purple being the colours for women but not exactly why: this might help you:

Internationally, purple is a colour for symbolizing women. Historically, the combination of purplegreen and white to symbolize women’s equality originated from the Women’s Social and Political Union in the U.K. in 1908. Purple signifies justice and dignity. Green symbolizes hope.
Grateful for these Women:
My tribute via Instagram and Facebook, now here is for the women who have helped shape me to be the woman I am today. I also include those who love and support me, particularly since my head and neck cancer. So, from those who went before me, and those who have been born – to me and then to my children, I salute you all. The women I am so grateful to have in my life. And as I said too, those who are not here and there are many more, are remembered with love in my heart.

Top: Mum, Her Sister My Aunty Poppy, Their Mum, My Nanny. Mid: Me with youngest GD on her BIRTHday, My daughter with her eldest & second eldest and her youngest. Bottom: Me held by paternal Gran, on left is her Mum (Nana) and my Mum on right. Three daughters of our son! With my daughter.

When is International Women’s Day?
International Women’s Day (IWD) is celebrated around the world on the 8th of March.

What is International Women’s Day?
International Women’s Day is celebrated in many countries around the world. It is a day when all women are recognised for their achievements. International Women’s Day was first born out of labour movements at the turn of the twentieth century in North America and across Europe.

Since those early days, International Women’s Day has grown in prominence and reach, touching women in every corner of the world. The growing international women’s movement has helped make International Women’s Day a central point for action, to build support for women’s rights and their full participation in the economy, politics, community and in everyday life.

History of International Women’s Day
In 1910, Clara Zetkin, the leader of the Women’s Office for the Social Democratic Party in Germany tabled the idea of an International Women’s Day at the second International Conference of Working Women in Copenhagen. The proposal received unanimous support from over one hundred women representing 17 countries.

The very first International Women’s Day was held the following year on March 19th. Meetings and protests were held across Europe, with the largest street demonstration attracting 30,000 women. In 1913, IWD was moved to March 8th and has been held on this day ever since.


International Women’s Day in Australia

Australia’s first International Women’s Day was held in 1928 in Sydney. Organised by the Militant Women’s
Movement, women called for equal pay for equal work, an 8 hour working day for shop girls and paid leave. The next
year the event spread to Brisbane. In 1931, annual marches were launched in both Sydney and Melbourne and both marches continue to be held today.

Since these early days, International Women’s Day has continued to grow. It is a day to celebrate women’s achievements and both highlight and work to address barriers that continue to perpetuate gender inequality.


International Women’s Day today

International Women’s Day has become a time to reflect on progress, to call for change and to celebrate the courage and determination of the women who changed history, and those who will advance gender equality into the future. International Women’s Day is an occasion to review how far women have come in their struggle for equality, peace and development. It is also an opportunity to unite, network and mobilise for meaningful change.

About International Women’s Day

Those who cared for me (and still do!) when I was diagnosed with head and neck cancer in May 2017.

Top: Cate who has been at every surgery and is the one I see regularly on my check-ups Then: Justine who is a specialist H&N cancer nurse who helped me before the July surgery and in my recovery time at home. Then: Stef who was the oral surgeon with did my gum biopsy & was the person who sensitively told me on Wed 17 May ’17, “squamous cell cancer is in the gums”. Last: never least: Ofelia who has been by my side whether I am laughing or crying at my prosthodontist appointments.

My life, since head and neck cancer, has been enhanced by my social life. Even when it looked like it might be a bit hard, I managed to get out as much as possible – and still do, so I can meet up with people I know via blogging and on-line.

I am grateful always for connections…and made a collage of these and some more friends I have met with.

My tribute to the women on International Women’s Day 2019, #IWD2019.

What did you do on International Women’s Day?

I am grateful for my blog’s followers & to join in Australian-based link ups each Monday, Tuesday, and on Wednesdays, Thursdays and Fridays

 

As I wrote last week on gratitude here, for #ztt is is an antidote to fear.

Thank you Min for #ZenTipsTuesday which I will link up for here.

Denyse.

On Wednesday I link here with Sue and Leanne for Midlife Share The Love.

Thursdays my link up to follow is Lovin Life with Leanne here.

And on Fridays here with Alicia for Open Slather.

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Remembering Mum’s Smile. 22/2019.

Remembering Mum’s Smile. 22/2019.

I admit it.

I inherited my Mum’s smile.

I did not always appreciate this until too late.

That was when I lost my smile to cancer.

Today it is 12 years since Mum died.

Wow.

The ‘last’ great smile photo taken by me at Mum and Dad’s 60th Wedding Anniversary lunch. 2006.

Mum was unwell for around 2 years before it was found in early 2007 that she had multiple brain tumours with no known primary source.

That was it. Mum said “no more tests” when there could have been further explorations based on what the Neurosurgeon saw in her MRI. When Mum said that, he said “that is what I would say for my Mum too.”

Dad and our close family agreed of course because Mum was not a fan of hospitals, doctors or illness and in some respects that was why diagnosis was delayed. BUT….we knew Mum. And she most of all knew herself. So, over the next 6 or so weeks, she gradually worsened. We had our chance to say goodbyes and over the final days, Dad stayed at her side in the private hospital going home at the nurse’s insistence as Mum would succumb soon. She did, once he left (that is the way with many isn’t it?) and then we knew that the love of Dad’s life, the mother of two, grandmother of four, great-grandmother of 3, mother-in-law and friend of many had died.

But, we celebrate Mum often. In the years that I have passed, I have called on her help with recipes I have forgotten some ingredients in -she was a self-taught home cook and great! And what I noticed, in more recent times, was how much my smile was like hers. Dad has this image above in his unit where he moved to 4 years after her death. He still has the various dried floral arrangement she loved to make or buy. I think I did get some of my creative loves from Mum but took a long while to acknowledge that.

Mum and I have never been considered alike in body, temperament and education background …I am my father’s daughter. But I am short like she was and I have definitely inherited her love of colourful clothing.

So, when I got cancer in my upper gum and under my top lip, I missed smiling more than eating. I truly did. It came as a surprise to me just how much it meant for me to smile.

Getting my smile back in August 2018 I did not stop beaming for quite some time.

Today then I pay tribute to Mum and her smile….with a few of mine she would love too!

Thanks Mum. Here’s some from me. Love, Denyse xx

How do you remember someone who has been part of your life and now gone?

Have you inherited any of your family’s traits?

It really can be something to consider!

Thanks for viewing and reading about my Mum today: 5 March 2019, 12 years after her death.

Denyse.

Joining with Sue and Leanne here for Midlife Share The Love on Wednesday.

Here I am linking up with Leanne for Lovin’ Life linky on Thursday.

 

 

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