Wednesday 22nd February 2017

My Week 8 Intention. Perspective. 2017.28.

My Week 8 Intention. Perspective. 2017.28.

I’ve mostly been a details person..small picture…even though I can imagine a big picture I need to know details and more.

Now, as I have found in life, THIS is not always possible.

Who knew?

Ok, we all know but sometimes it is hard to let go of welded on beliefs of shoulds and musts.

Here’s where perspective will be more to the front than behind as I work (and play) with my intention for this week.

I want to continue to work with details because I find that comforting and helpful but I also want to keep in mind the bigger picture too.

From this:

 

To this:

My Week 8  intention is to broaden my view, keep matters in perspective and look at the whole picture wherever possible.

Update: last week’s intention of taking a break worked for me in some respects although learner-me who wants to ‘get better’ from her IBS and anxiety continues to seek new information and practise meditation and more. It was good to give myself permission to ‘take a break’ and the supportive comments from many helped!

What’s your intention this week?

Are you a big picture or details person?

Denyse.

Linking here with Sue from Sizzling at 60.

On Thursdays I link here with Leanne for Lovin Life.

FacebooktwitterpinterestFacebooktwitterpinterest
FacebooktwitterpinterestFacebooktwitterpinterest

My Week 7 Intention. Take a Break. 2017.24.

My Week 7 Intention. Take a Break. 2017.24.

I have had a bit of a  rough week because I am trying too hard.

Yes, this is something that I do not realise until it’s almost too late.

It’s been a rough week on the health front with a nasty IBS flare. I can never really explain the why of IBS for me but I do get upset when the what of IBS impacts my life. The episodes meant I could not travel even to a needed appointment. It gets me down.

As a result of that, I try to fix things. I try too hard because that is who I am and I need to slow myself down and be more gentle and kindly towards myself.

I do not ’cause’ the IBS but I still have to live with its consequences and its effects on my confidence and demeanour.

I can add the HEATWAVE has affected me too as I dread the onset of extreme weather and as a worrier I think ‘what would we do if the power went off?’

So, I am giving myself a week off…from learning to manage my health symptoms and effects to….taking a more relaxed approach to life in retirement as it is for me!

My Intention for Week 7 is to give myself a break and take one! To do less learning and stop trying hard. To enjoy more moments that are about becoming absorbed in something creative or just being.

The way the past week was did not help my Week 6 intention of react less and respond more because my inner tension levels were higher. So, that’s OK too. I know what I need to do…and that is LESS..this week coming up!

How are you going?

Do you sometime try too hard and not realise until later?

Tell me more!

Denyse.

UPDATED as of Thursday 16 February. Since publishing this on Sunday some things have changed for the better…I have been listening to an amazing program about ‘helping your nervous illness’ (as she named anxiety back in the 1960s) by Dr Claire Weekes. I cannot explain without a whole blog post but I can tell you her messages are exactly what I needed to hear and understand. 

 

Joining Leanne’s lovin life linky here each Thursday. Thanks to her lovely team too I am really enjoying your comments!

FacebooktwitterpinterestFacebooktwitterpinterest
FacebooktwitterpinterestFacebooktwitterpinterest

Meditations for Back to School. 2017.22.

Meditations for Back to School. 2017.22.

I wonder what you thought when you saw this title?

In fact it IS about meditation and it IS for kids…yes!

From my experience of the past two years, meditation is helpful. I use it for helping me stay in the moment more and for being mindful. I’ve written about it here.

More and more though, it is found that a few minutes of meditation, slowing down to focus on the ‘here and now’ and the breath is an excellent strategy for us all. It is not about clearing the mind nor about going to sleep.

Smiling Mind is an Australian-based company producing apps and meditations on-line. The app is free. I have used this app a few times. I like the Australian accent too. Here’s the link to Smiling Mind to find out more.

What caught my eye recently from the ABC in Australia is this:

Meditations for Back to School.*

There are meditations for kids and teachers. I tried the kid one and that’s why I am sharing it here. I would suggest having a go with your children.

I would also try it with a class if I was still teaching!

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-TnQWp8VBwqQ/UePpQ7YiMWI/AAAAAAAAArw/StA8xwN1J7A/s1600/meditation+for+children.jpg

 

Here from ABC and Smiling Mind. From their website:

Our vision is to see mindfulness meditation on the Australian National Curriculum by 2020.

This hopeful statement from the Dalai Lama provides food for thought.

*Not a sponsored post..I just like to share what I think is helpful for families and education.

Have you tried meditation?

Do your children meditate?

Tell me more!

Denyse.

 

 

 

 

 

It is I Blog On Tuesday time I. B. O.T! Joining Kylie Purtell and the crew who blog on Tuesdays here.

FacebooktwitterpinterestFacebooktwitterpinterest
FacebooktwitterpinterestFacebooktwitterpinterest

My Week 6 Intention. React Less Respond More. 2017.20.

My Week 6 Intention. React Less Respond More. 2017.20.

credit: https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/0b/75/1e/0b751e663829b6a2b95fa9e144b06085.jpg

I have always been a react first…and sometimes (OK, maybe a lot) an over-reactor who almost always regrets her behaviour.

Oh why oh why?

I think I know why…really..it’s about unexpressed words or views and how I need to get in first..maybe it’s about needing to think I have ‘control’ but then again..that’s not an excuse is it? Here’s an interesting take on the two!

credit: http://d3fhkv6xpescls.cloudfront.net/blog/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/react-vs-respond.jpg

However, I do know that I regret my reactions almost EVERY.SINGLE.TIME.

I would rather take TIME to consider my response rather than react as I know the other person will feel valued and I will feel satisfied that I have not placed my frustrations or blame on another.

My Intention for Week 6 is to slow down my reaction to any given situation so that I take a breath, have a think of how I will behave, and make a response. I will also forgive myself for forgetting this and get back up and remember again!

Update: Intention Week 5. Listening actively has become an almost -automatic response (see what I did there!) and it really has changed me from within and in my dealings with others. 

So what is your style?

Reactor? Responder? Bit of both?

Tell me more!

Denyse.

Joining Leanne on Thursdays for Lovin Life Linky here.

P.S. This is from one of my favourite on-line teachers ever…Tara Brach. She has written two books I love and has a regular podcast too. Pop over to tarabrach.com to find out more.

If you have the time…this is awesome! Thanks Tara.

FacebooktwitterpinterestFacebooktwitterpinterest
FacebooktwitterpinterestFacebooktwitterpinterest

My Week 5 Intention. Listen Actively. 2017.16.

My Week 5 Intention. Listen Actively. 2017.16.

I have been delighted with my success in carrying out my intention to #savourthepositive. I used Instagram to spread my message and it was a good reminder each day to continue with encouragement and support from my followers! Thank you!

thought I was good at listening but like many, I listen with an ear (and brain!) that is formulating a response or an opinion.

I have noticed that when I listen actively  speakers are both engaged and valued and it is demonstrated in their body language.

The person I listen to most and need to be more actively listening to is my husband.

In the past, I have been butting in, arguing the point and all those things I know chatty and bossy people like me can be.

What I now know is how much my relationship is changed for the better when I listen actively.

This is my Week 5 Intention.

http://3childrenandit.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/05/listen-pic.jpg

I will actively listen in conversations with my husband each time we chat. I will also actively listen when I am out and about locally and speaking to people on the phone.

For those who are interested in the work and research about relationships from the Gottman Institute here is more about Active Listening. Dr Gottman and his wife have interesting and consistent research about whether a relationship in trouble may be saved or not….and no surprises, having respect and regard for the other is one. This is exemplified in active listening!

Denyse.

Joining in with Leanne and the Lovin Life crew each Thursday here.

FacebooktwitterpinterestFacebooktwitterpinterest
FacebooktwitterpinterestFacebooktwitterpinterest

My Week 4 Intention. Savour The Positive Pt 1. 2017.12.

My Week 4 Intention. Savour The Positive Pt 1. 2017.12.

Last week I know I benefitted from my intention of kindness and it was brought home to me even more after a stressful time on Tuesday. I had to summon up the courage to drive a long way (45 minutes) on a super hot day to the periodontist who I HAD to see about my poor gums. I did it, but it was at a physical and emotional cost the next day when my IBS struck and I couldn’t go out. But, instead of my ‘old ways’ of talking to myself and thinking I had ‘failed’ I was able to be kindly towards myself in word and action and be a friend to myself!

Being a friend to yourself takes practice!

It was also lovingly helpful to have so many commenters who understood what I was writing about when they read my post last week. Thank you all! This kindness that is spreading around is GOOD!

Building upon this, and wanting to continue to learn more about how our thinking can distort our feelings (and vice versa) I have become a firm fan of the work of Rick Hanson PhD & his collaborator  Richard Mendius MD. He speaks from years of research about the ‘neurons which fire together wire together’ and how we CAN affect our health by too much of the negative messages,  self-talk and so on.

I have been listening to him speak with  Richard Mendius about  and in doing so, am beginning to make some subtle but helpful changes to my daily experiences.

My Intention Week 4/52. 

My intention this week is to ensure I am taking time to SAVOUR positive experiences of all kinds including these:

knowing I am loved and have a person who is my best friend to talk to, hug and be companion to every single day

that the world of nature just outside my house in the form of my small garden offers me opportunities to observe, smell and touch to let the memories flood my brain

I know this needs to be on-going so next week will be an update and more about what I have learned via the lessons and meditations from this CD program.

Have a good week everyone.

Denyse.

I join Leanne and friends here for the Lovin Life Linky on Thursdays.

FacebooktwitterpinterestFacebooktwitterpinterest
FacebooktwitterpinterestFacebooktwitterpinterest

My Week 3 Intention. Compassion. 2017.8.

Week 3 Intention. Compassion. 2017.8.

I am continuing my inward journey this week of intention by learning more about compassion. I have much to learn and firstly about myself. I guess I am tough on myself as many of us are. In fact, both my GP and Psychologist have told me that very thing. I am hearing the words of a very wise man, my husband who says “I expect too much of myself”. What I am doing…and learning…is ‘how to be more compassionate to myself’ as I begin the slow journey of being slightly more confident about how to accept Irritable Bowel Syndrome as it is now because the anxiety it brings can overwhelm me.

Here are some excerpts from an article I read yesterday. The link to the full article is at the end of this.

Compassion is the feeling that naturally arises when you learn of the suffering of another, and that motivates you to want to do something to help. Far from being just a social nicety, compassion has a great evolutionary purpose: Human offspring are the most dependent and vulnerable of any species, and need the most care from others to survive. This total dependence is why Charles Darwin said that sympathy is humanity’s strongest instinct. Simply put: Without compassion we wouldn’t survive.

If you find yourself feeling less moved than you’d like—or maybe your empathy muscle has grown a bit weak from lack of use—here are some ways to strengthen it. You, and every other living creature, will benefit from the results.

Be Kind to Yourself

Sometimes it’s easier to feel compassionate for another than for yourself. But true compassion doesn’t discriminate. The next time you’re having a difficult moment, see if you can offer yourself some kindness. You might be surprised at how much it helps—and helps you to feel kinder toward others.

Turn Values Into Verbs

When asked what they value most in the world, people will often say things like “peace,” “compassion,” or “connection.” But in order to make this real we have to turn these values into verbs, making them more specific and practical. If you value compassion, what does that look like daily? Take out a piece of paper, write “Compassion” at the top and create a list of actions, small to big, that you can start doing immediately.

This is how we live Gandhi’s words: “Be the change that you wish to see in the world.”

This is the source of the full article by Elisha Goldstein.

My intention for Week 3 of 2017.

“dipping my toes” in the water – making small changes!

Each time I take the smallest steps in gaining some greater confidence about living with IBS I will give myself words of support and ensure I write down how it went for me as my psychologist and I planned.

Are you compassionate towards yourself?

Tell me more!

Denyse.

 

Joining Leanne’s linky called Lovin’ Life here this Thursday!

 

FacebooktwitterpinterestFacebooktwitterpinterest
FacebooktwitterpinterestFacebooktwitterpinterest

My Week 2 Intention. Be Kind. 2017.4.

My Week 2 Intention. 2017.4.

Last week I wrote about intention here. I have had a more challenging week than I would have liked so I admit it has been difficult to even decide to blog for the second week about it.

Here goes.

At least I am blogging the truth!

I did notice nature more in the past week. In fact, I went into nature, particularly our little back garden, to both de-fuse and become more grounded.

Having anxiety from time to time (more like all the time lately) coupled with its hanger-on IBS has not a good week made!

This week. Be Kind To Myself.

The intention  is to be  KIND to myself in thoughts, and deeds and to consider myself (and the various things that are going wrong for me) OK. That sounds easy but it can be hard when you (I) are a task master/mistress who has exacting standards. So, instead of berating myself for not feeling emotionally strong or having an episode of IBS I will be KIND(er) than I have been.

Tomorrow’s post, for Life This Week, is My Word for 2017 reveals a very similar word for me.

Are you someone who finds it easy or hard to be kind towards yourself?

Denyse.

 

 

 

 

 

Linking up with Leanne here for Lovin Life on Thursdays!

FacebooktwitterpinterestFacebooktwitterpinterest
FacebooktwitterpinterestFacebooktwitterpinterest